Heard he doesn't miss me

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-22-2008
Heard he doesn't miss me
3
Fri, 02-08-2008 - 4:43pm

It's been 3 weeks since the breakup. Only about 4 days of no contact. I have contacted him about every 3-4 days since the breakup.


I ran into a mutual friend. Actually, his bestfriend, the guy that introduced us, etc. I asked him if my ex was doing okay with all of this. He said "Yep, he's doing fine". I asked if my ex missed me he said "No, I don't think so. When I asked him he said not really".


This broke my heart. We were ENGAGED!! How could he not miss me?! Maybe because I am not leaving him alone? We talked every single day, now we barely talk at all...I guess he is fine with it...


I was still holding onto we might reconcile when he comes back home in May. (He's in the military. We've been long distance since October.)


How can you not miss someone you were supposed to spend the rest of your life with?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Fri, 02-08-2008 - 4:49pm

Maybe he doesn't want to share those 'missing her' feelings with a guy friend?


Sometimes it happens. I have a cousin when her boyfriend moved 500 miles away - she was supposed to join him in a few months - while he was gone, she realized she didn't miss him at all and broke off the relationship.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2007
Fri, 02-08-2008 - 7:30pm

Well I wasnt' engaged, but I am having the same feelings.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2007
Fri, 02-08-2008 - 8:51pm

If you were in a mature, adult relationship and things ended amicably, then I'm sure he probably misses you, whether it be as a partner or as a friend. When you have a good relationship and it ends, there will absolutely be good things that are impossible not to miss.

However, it's really not appropriate to ask his friend if your ex misses you. Number one, that puts him in a weird position. Number two, it makes you look desperate. It also prevents you from moving on. If he says no, he doesn't miss you, that hurts. If he says yes, that creates false hope.

My advice to you would be DON'T ASK. You don't want to know the answer.