Heart Broken
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Heart Broken
| Tue, 06-27-2006 - 11:38pm |
My boyfriend, well, now ex-boyfriend, have officially broken up with me this past Saturday (June 24th) He said to be freinds but I said no. One wrong thing I did was that I begged him that night to not break up with me. At least I tried. Then I called the next day (Sunday) maybe he changed his mind, but he kept telling me that it would be a good thing for me. We were together for a year and three months. A year and two months of long distance. And a month being in the same city. We had a rough realtionship, and we also had great times. One thing was our culture, our different believes, and different wants. He is 15 years older than I. I love him. He was my first, on everything. I still have a hope that he will be coming back knocking my door, but the only way I will ever go back with him is only if he has a life to offer me. I miss him so much, and now that he lives so close. Why is it so hard to control my emotions? I am trying to control my thoughts... But ahhh!!!!! I do not think he loves me. He would not have let me go just like that! "I lvoe you, but let's break up" -- What is that? I am still in shock that all this have happened.

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I am in the same boat, seems we all are, and all those jerks are from the same mold. My boyfriend of 3 1/2 years just broke up with me, its been one week and one day. It sucks totally, i miss him madly, love him more than life, and he gives me the same ol crap, I love you, we are so great together, blah, blah, but my point is, if you love me so much why let me go? I put alittle pressure on him for a life commitment two weeks prior, he said he wasn't ready, so i said, ok i'm out then..he caved in two days saying i will give you the commitment just not in the immediate future...all was great, we have been together five nights a week and all of every weekend for the last three years...then after fathers day wknd he went back to his home town for the wknd, visiting his dad, he said he did alot of thinking and he cant give me what i want, i deserve better, blah, blah, i love you, will miss you, etc... so i played it cool and said ok, take your break, have a nice life... i was crying, but didnt think it would go this far, i thought he would have maybe taken a week, guess not. Today is very hard for me, every Wednesday we had what we called Weezie Wednesday, it was a without fail, no interuptions night dedicated to eachother, dinner, outing, lovin whatever. This is why i decided to join this post AGAIN! I was here appox. two years ago, with the same jerk, i called, texed, settled for every couple of days of just sex...he came back to me in 6 weeks...BUT, here i am again, more hurt, worse off, its two more years. Here is what I am doing, I bought this book..."Closing the deal" by RichardKirshenbaum and Daniel Rosenberg...Chapter 8, it has helped me so much...I am not caving this time, its very hard, but we girls have to have respect for ourselves, and let them go. I feel i will never find anyone better or never be in love again, etc... If its meant to be, it will be, give him his space, and time, and if he comes back with a LIFE for you great, if not then he wasn't worth it. Men are hunters, they go after what they want, and when you chase something they run, so NO CONTACT!! Also, the last time we broke up, he told me he was so miserable every night, missed me terribly, missed my scent, my body, my caring for him, i did everything for him cleaned his house ironed his work shirts, did his laundry, it just makes me so angry he can let that go...anyhow, sorry so long, hang in there, i am going thru the exact same thing...if you want, you can email me and we can get into more detail..weezmezz@msn.com ...I met two girls two years ago, and we still compare notes, talk daily, one got her guy back, one didn't, so hang in there girlie, and contact me if you want!
Louise
Thank you! It was a pretty good post (not trying to sound conceited here).
I actually printed it out after I wrote it so that everytime I'm feeling down I can look at it and remember that it's going to be okay.
~Amber~
Hello “MRNTPRFCT”
You may not be perfect, but for someone who is going to love you unconditionally will find you perfect. You sound like incredible man. I am complaining about a relationship of a year and three months, when a marriage of 17 years ended. You must have gone through more pain that I am going through. Specially having a child in between.
Believing that things happen for its reasons lets me move on. What happens to me I take it as an experience and to become a better person. I did what I could. I gave hoping to received back, but I tried to not expect anything back.
I hope things get better for you. I really hope, from my sincere wishes, that you meet a wonderful woman that will appreciate everything you do and have. It is never too late to find true love. Life takes its time, what can you do?
Thank you for sharing your story with me. Write me anytime…
xoxo
I can't stop thinking about my exboyfreind! I can't even believe he is my "ex" now... Aww, I can't take it anymore. It has been five days... and he does not show up. I wish it was never over...........
:(
Its okay to feel that way.
Its been over two months for me and I still think about him all the time. I still can't believe we're not together anymore.
I too wish we were still together, but trust me when I say it does get better.
IT DOES GET BETTER :). You will smile again one day and actually mean it. The first few weeks are the hardest.
I remember going through life thinking that I was a fraud. Because on the outside I looked all happy like nothing in my life was wrong, but on the inside I was dying. You will get over that feeling.
I wish you luck, and if there's anything you need, let me know.
~Amber~
Just when I thought I was in my routine of Chinese food and Law and Order...just when I thought I was okay with being single, in steps the guy of my dreams. Needless to say, it didn't work out and this is day 2 of not hearing from him. My choice though because of course he wants to stay friends, of course he wants his cake and eat it too. But I know I have to let him go. I know I have to stop obsessing on what could have been. I've got to stop obsessing about his eyes, his arms, his neck his voice, his smell...stop obsessing about a life together and face the truth. I can only now let time pass, embrace my faith, friends and family and to avoid all contact with him. Although he's not as cowardly as most guys are (albeit there is still the coward trait left in him)...he will return my calls...he actually calls me...but that's not good for me. I love him and I need him to stop calling me. I didn't sign on for friendship, (yes, I want to be best friends with the man I marry) but I initially signed on for a relationship, marriage, children etc. And these are the things he told me he wanted. I can only trust God with my heart and if this guy is for me, then he'll fix the problems in his life and he'll come back. If not, then I've got to move on...I've got to somehow beleive that I will be happy again, that I will smile again, that I won't have to take sleeping pills at night jsut to get some peace, that I won't feel the urge to cry, that this lump that's forever lodged inside my throat will suddenly disolve. it's not fair. It's not fair that we're made this way and that they (guys) can just get over it, can just ignore us, can just feed us silly lines like (i need time to myself). But somehow, we do move on...in our own way...whether we embrace our faith or whatever way, we do. Because we are strong and we do deserve better and do you know why I know that? because we as women are willing to love, we are willing to fight for that love, we are willing to put up with whatever it takes to make a relationship work...so why, why can't we expect at least as much? We should. I know it's hard and we get hung up on certain things about that certain guy but we deserve to be fought for! We deserve to be loved as much as we are willing to love.
God help us and give us the strength we need (even now as my tears make it impossible for me to see).
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