help!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2006
help!
3
Wed, 07-26-2006 - 12:52am
due to circumstances out of my control, i had to move 4 states away from my boyfriend. he and i were together for 11 months and i am very in love with him. we decided to break off our relationship when i made the move but also decided to stay friends. its been an ok situation until recently when he decided to hang out with other girls. he says he has no intention of doing anything besides be friends with any of them and i believe him. hes never lied to me before. it turns out that the girls hes been hanging out with like him, and when i found out all of my defenses came crashing down and ive been depressed (cant eat, cant sleep, cant focus on anything) and have cried enough tears to fill the atlantic ocean in teh past couple of days. anyone have any advice on accepting this situation? im truely at a loss for what to do.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2003
In reply to: aleishajoann
Wed, 07-26-2006 - 2:49am
Hon, your friends and not BF and GF so he can literally hang with other girls. Since you're in love with him still, but choose not to be in a relationship I'd suggest to not contact him for a while. Work on getting over him before getting back to the frindship. The day you don't feel jealous about him hanging with other women or even dating them, that day you can be his friend. Don't stress over what you can't control. He's a free man and can date whoever he likes. He may be choosing not to tell you because of the relationship you once had. Be sure that he's moving on with his life while you're still mopping over what it was but it's not anymore.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2006
In reply to: aleishajoann
Fri, 07-28-2006 - 12:52am
Is there a particular reason you didn't want to continue the relationship long-distance?

~~.: Sandra :.~~

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2006
In reply to: aleishajoann
Fri, 07-28-2006 - 5:20pm

Hi there,

I'm not in a pleasant situation myself and I'm going through same emotions as you... but I've been in a couple of long distance relationships and I have to tell you that they rarely work... The only time it works is when you know there's an end to it. Are you moving back eventually?

Sometimes, one person sacrifices and move for the other person but I find that that also doesn't really work either because that person will always remind the other person about the sacrifice he/she made everytime they fight or something...

Hang in there... I hope everything works out.