Help! Abusive Husband
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|Mon, 12-31-2012 - 10:21am|
Here's the deal-husband and I have a joint account for our paychecks. He has been emotionally and verbally abusive over the years and I want to leave. He has thrown things "in my direction", latest being half a banana and once a remote control and once a manual can opener. He calls me names like "idiot" and if I don't agree with him on something trivial he tells me to "F-off." He is controlling and nickel and dimes me. Daily, he looks at out accounts online to see activity.
I want to leave but the abuse center I contacted said to move out when he is not home. FIrst off, we both work. He works from home some days, some scheduled some are not so it's very unpredictable. Secondly, I have only a few hundred dollars stashed and that is not nearly enough for a deposit on an apartment. The abuse center said don't move my money until just before I leave but I told them I cannot leave without money. They did not have anything to advise me to do about this! I have direct deposit for my paycheck and it takes about a month to switch accounts.
I have health issues that limit my physical energy so packing and leaving in ONE DAY is so overwhelming to me! I make less than $40K and he makes about four times this! I don't want to leave all my possessions that I had before we married with him, and I want to take some basic furniture items. I married late in life (mid-30's) and we have been married 15 years and have a teenage daughter. He treats her badly as well.
I don't have a strong support system - parents are elderly and sickly, siblings spread out, not really any close friends to speak of. I can't even get away to attend the support group I want to go to because he will question my whereabouts.
I NEED SOME ADVICE, POSSIBLY FROM SOMEONE WHO HAS BEEN IN THE SAME SITUATION. I don't know where to start to make my "escape."