How can he go from ME to HER!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2005
How can he go from ME to HER!
3
Wed, 02-09-2005 - 11:16am
OK I will make this long story short. I broke up with my boyfriend of 5 years the end of November. It has been the worst few months of my life but I am seeing that there is a light at the end of the breakup tunnel. I am better off without him...
However, my new problem lies in the fact that he keeps hanging out with this girl (who I met while we were together and she was nice to my face! "Oh, he talks about you all the time..yada yada"). She does not exactly have a great reputation...in fact she is heinously unattractive and is apparently a huge slut. He insists that they were not fooling around while we were together, although I suspect otherwise. He also says they are "just friends". I spent hours analyzing why he could keep hanging out with this girl when he knows it hurts me so much. It hasn't exactly been a boost to my self esteem. Please help...
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-09-2005 - 12:29pm

naptownmandy...


Pianoguy thinks you are doing TOO MUCH ANALYZING...and should STOP THIS HABIT IMMEDIATELY!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2004
Wed, 02-09-2005 - 1:05pm


Hi

Sorry to say, but you broke up with the guy, and he no longer has to consider your opinions and feelings. No matter for what reason, you had a right to end this relationship. Now that it is over however, what he does with his life as sad as it may be, is really none of your business anymore.

What does it matter anymore if he was with her when the two of you were together? You are no longer dating, so why bother wondering. There is no point in spending hours analyzing why he keeps hanging out with this girl right now. He does not care how much it hurts you now, because quite frankly unless the break up was mutual, he is probably hurt himself because you broke up with him.

If you want to boost your self confidence, consider the fact that he is probably more devastated than you about this break up, because let’s face it he got dumped and had no choice but to move on.

There is no reason why it should bother you who he is with, because you chose to cut him out of your life, and he is free to do whatever he wants with whomever he wants, just like you are free to do as you please.

It seems that you made a decision to leave him and now you can’t live with the consequences of that decision. It sounds selfish, because it seems that you let him go but you do not want him to date/meet others. Sorry, he has as much of a right to move on as you do.

Take care of yourself and do nice things for yourself, hang out with friends and meet new people, so you won’t have to think about him. Spend your time on thinking about people that you want in your life not people that you don’t.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2004
Thu, 02-10-2005 - 9:51pm
Maybe he's hanging out with her because he knows that you don't like
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