How do I make it stop hurting?
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How do I make it stop hurting?
| Fri, 06-10-2005 - 10:47pm |
i know it was the right thing to do - to finally end things. but it hurts so much right now. i want to call him so badly. i want to be held by him. i haven't spent a weekend alone in 6 months. i don't know how to do this and everytime i try to figure out a way - my eyes well up with tears and i start crying like crazy. i miss him so much. i know he's not the one for me but i want to cuddle with him and hug and kiss and sleep with him. i just wish i didn't hurt like this. i don't know how i'm going to get to sleep tonight.
any suggestions?

I know it sounds cliche, but time really helps. It's been about 2 1/2 months sind I ended my relationship, and though it was the right thing to do (we were horrible together), it's still painful. It's hard to be alone after spending so much time with someone.
I made a list of all the reasona I left him, and another list of the qualities I was looking for in a man (some he possessed, but none of the deal breakers... like having a JOB). It helps me to look over the list, the actual physical piece of paper I wrote it down on, when I'm wanting to cuddle, kiss, and hold him. I try to remind myself that I'm just lonely, and that it's not a good idea to go down that road again.
Hope that helps a little... I know that not much really can right now. I've been reading and sleeping ALOT. Anything to take my mind off of the lonliness.
Time is so hard to understand, I saw my first true love today for the first time in almost two years, we were in our cars, and he just looked my way as I did the same. I started to cry, how I wanted to stop and talk to him. I could feel him and how he wanted the same. It was that look you know? yes I am crazy to be feeling this way after so much time. I don't think you will ever stop feeling for that person but it does get better as time goes by. The hurt part is what I mean. you see I know how it feels to lose that special someone after all we were together since we were 13yrs old and now we are both 34 yrs. Even though I am married but not truly happy, I will always wonder about the "WHAT IF'S". I always ask myself maybe we should of gotten married back then, but.....
it did not work out that way. But, we did spend 3 yrs together two years ago which ended badly on both our parts. I guess what I am trying to tell you if you love someone dearly the hurt gets better like a wound, but when you see that person again it feels as if you opened up your wound again.
I just wanted to add my 2cents in.
Hi, I know what you mean. I ended something too that was the right thing. Ultimately it's because they can't/won't give us what we want. I'm just holding on to the reasons that it wasn't meant to be, and trying to let it go, that it is out of my hands. We can't force them or the situation to be any different. Just pray, and take one day at a time. If they want things to be different, they will move mountains, so they say. I believe we will be alright
Hugs for you
Grace