How do I make it through the HOLIDAYS?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2004
How do I make it through the HOLIDAYS?
1
Thu, 12-23-2004 - 5:16pm
We broke up 2 1/2 months ago. We have talked 2 times in the past two weeks. No contact has helped me. I haven't broke down crying in a few weeks now. I was simply finishing up last minute Christmas shopping in Wal-Mart a little while ago and I had to leave immediately. Thought of him flooded my thoughts. The last thing I wanted to do was cry right there. So I held it until I got to my vehicle. Now I'm home in my sweats watching TV when I should be out enjoying buying gifts. Lastyear ofcourse we shopped together. How in the world am I going to make it through Christmas at my families. They are all married...I'm the only one that's single.
What are things I could do to keep from thought of him flooding me over there like it did when I was shopping? This is the first breakup that has ever upset me. We were engaged and getting married in the spring.
I'm going to try to go back late tonight and finish shopping when it's not so crowded. All I can do right now is sit and cry. Please....I need advice.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2004
Thu, 12-23-2004 - 6:50pm

Hi hun,

I feel your pain. The holidays tend to be great when things are going great, but they tend to be not so good when we are hurting. I understand how the memories can just come flooding back and totally overwhelm you. Know that you're not alone! A good friend of mine has suggested that we pretend it's Thanksgiving...neither of us are in "the mood" for Christmas this year....breaking up with someone you love really tends to put a damper on things!! my advice? Let yourself cry. But put a limit on it. I let myself cry at night, when all the memories are really strong.....but I stop myself after a bit, after I feel as though I have gotten it out of my system. Don't push yourself. Let yourself feel what you are feeling, and let yourself grieve. It's been 4 months for me, so I'm a bit farther along than you. It does get better.....slowly. Keep posting. And don't feel like you are alone, especially at this time of year!

Hugs,
Karen