How to end the post-break-up sting??- Advice needed
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|Tue, 05-07-2013 - 9:09am|
I recently broke up with my girlfriend of 3 years just short of a month ago. I’m the one that finally pulled the trigger to end it, but it was clear that it was destined to end. It’s not what I wanted to do, but clear that it was time.
Needless to say, this separation hasn’t been easy to cope with. Despite putting a great deal of thought into ending this, and coming close on many occasions this past year to pulling the plug, I still feel a great deal of pain and confusion in my heart over this.
Not only does it hurt not having her to love, but knowing that she is actually dealing with the breakup pretty well, and moving on easier than I am hurts the most. I don’t jump into a relationship very quickly, nor do I find it easy to meet women to work on developing one. For one, because I tend to be incredibly shy and a bit socially “unseasoned”, but also I am picky about people I invite into my circle.
What’s the best way to overcome this? We agreed to be civil and remain friends of some sort, but I don’t know if and how that would work, especially if she is seeing or hooking up with other men. And she has not expressed an interest in talking. I found out that almost immediately after we broke up, she put herself on a dating website looking to “hang out’, and “Casual dating with no commitment”. AKA, a “friend with benefits”. This, I think, is what hurts the most, on top of the history and good times we shared. It seems as if she is easily writing off the past three years.
So what do I do? Dating prospects on my end have not been as fruitful as I wished they’d be at this point that would purge her from my heart. And I’m not too keen on pursuing (nor knowledgeable on how to even start ) a FWB thing. I’m itching to open up a line of communication again with her, but in all seriousness, I don’t know what it would accomplish other than deepening the wounds on my end.