How long for the no contact rule?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-03-2005
How long for the no contact rule?
2
Mon, 11-21-2005 - 6:48am
For those who have experience in this area, (this was my first love so I'm new to a 'real' break up), how long does the n/c rule apply? I ask because my ex is my neighbor and we run in the same circles. Our feelings are both raw right now. He is very angry with me and has trouble controling his tongue, (he makes angry or ugly comments when he sees me). I'm not at all afraid of him, (no reason to be, he isn't violent), and he does get himself under control fairly quickly so the comments aren't even enough to upset me for more than a moment or two. But I'm wondering, how long should I avoid the holiday parties, neighborhood volleyball games and things of that nature?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 11-21-2005 - 8:09am

michele08053...

Pianoguy thinks NO CONTACT is difficult in your situation. Simply because the 2 of you pretty much 'hung out' in the same social circles together.

If you're not uncomfortable being in the same room with the EX...then you might as well socialize, but keep your distance FROM HIM!

However....don't be surprised if you find yourself being stared at by others in the room...who know that each of you were once a couple!

Pianoguy

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 11-21-2005 - 12:23pm

How long were you together? Generally, I've found the rule of thumb that it takes about half the time you were in the relationship to be completely over someone to be pretty accurate, at least for shorter relationships (up to 2 years or so). But the fact that you have to have SOME contact with him will probably lengthen the time frame.

OTOH, the fact that he's being so awful to you could make things easier...you're seeing his true colors.

Sheri