Hurtful words
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| Thu, 04-13-2006 - 10:05am |
Good Morning ladies,
I feel really upset this morning. I know I'll feel better later on today when I go to lunch with a friend and when my roommate is able to talk to me (its exam time now). I don't know if I am upset that he is seeing someone new.Of course he is going to say that she is so much better than me... its a new realtionship and I said some pretty hard things to him last night. Like that I thought he was ugly and that I used him for the last full year and never actually liked him. It was true but I think it was petty to say. He then told me I was ugly and my research job this summer didn't mean anything and I wasn't smart. It didn't hurt as much since I knew he was mad so most of it was to make me feel low.
I'm just mad because he will be living in here again next year and I will have to see him with this rebound girl. He says shes not a rebound but what else could it be if he needs validation from a girl. Thats why I can't see anyone now since validation comes from within and I definately need to find myself. That is the difficult part. Espcially since I have to do it in a place where "everyone hates me" or so he says. I wish he would grow up and move on from here. My mum has been telling me that he is just saying those things to make me feel bad about myself. She said don't let it get to me. I'm trying hard. I don't feel as emotionally hurt as before since it is clear that for the last year I had no real feelings for him.
If anyone has any insight in to this kind of situation I would love to know.
Thanks
Ibis

I don't understand, if the two of you are broken up and he's seeing someone new, why are you two talking? No Contact would be best to help you heal.
The hurtful words, well, you are both human, both of you want to get your digs in and make the other person feel bad. One of you will have to decide to stop slinging mud and keep their mouth shut. Writing UNSENT letters to vent the normal hurt, anger and grief you feel is helpful.
I hope you can take a step back and not participate in the cr@p.
Carrie
Well it was the last time we talked and he finally admitted that he was seeing someone "so much better" than me. Well good for him. He knew how I felt about him, that I was used him and that I wanted to see other people. We will never talk again. He needs to get over himself and be happy with someone new. I am glad that I got to say some of the things I said. I didn't say much in the way of making him feel bad about himself -- like he said to me (I'm ugly, stupid etc.) I just said that for the last year I had no feelings towards him and it was obvious to the people that know me best. I'm glad I got that out. Now I never have to talk to him again! Hopefully!
Thanks,
Ibis