HUuuuge mess

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2004
HUuuuge mess
1
Sun, 12-19-2004 - 7:54pm
I wrote about this guy a while back. We went out for a while and then we decided not to se each other anymore. ALthough it was a mutual decision, he started acting up, being moody around me, (we live and work together in program in our University). I asked him what was up and he wouldnt tell me until one day he came back from a retreat. He said his feelings for me were never all that strong and that he was sorry he led me on. He said that the reason why he acted up was cuz he felt guilty and whenever he saw me he would remember what he did to me. Ofcourse it crushed me but i started to move on. Unfortunately his behavior did not change with his apology. I even saw him crying one evening after i came back from a party with my girlfriends. He had seen me earlier and i know he thought i looked good. I enjoyed it, but didnt give it a second thought. In any case, this weekend we had a retreat for the program we are in. on Saturday night we both got drunk and I started bitching at him telling him he was an a**hole bc he broke my heart. Somehow we ended up making out and between kisses, he would tell me that i deserved better, and I said i knew i did, but continued kissing. Im not too sure of the details, other than we saying to each other that we miss each other and other things. People who live with us saw all of this and even video taped it. They said it was pretty intense and one of my closest friends said that she thought he and I were gonna ended up in bed together...
ANyway, today we drove back in the same car but he did not seem to remember anything clearly. Ofcourse he was still somewhat drunk/hangover so im kinda nervous about what he will remember later on. We did not speak at all and i acted as if nothing had happened. I dont know how we're gonna deal with this cuz as I said...we barely spoke to each other as it was and the tension between us was horrible. I dont really want to talk about it, seeing as how i bassically threw myself at him but i have a feeling it is probably necessary. ALthough i dont want to get back with him, im really afraid of what he's gonna say, i really dont want to hear his whole post-retreat shpill again (the retreat before the one we just went to). Im just really afraid and totally unsure of what to do. If anyone can help me figure it out PLEASE DO!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2003
In reply to: cr8sea
Sun, 12-19-2004 - 9:38pm
The facts are like this : you're two adults, you two got drunk and made out and you two threw in a little show, noone was hurt and you both enjoyed it. Nothing wrong with that. I wouldn't mention anything and would act like nothing happened. I'm sure he does remember something but hasn't mentioned it. What you did you did and there is nothing to do about it. Continue with your life and move on. He'll do the same.