I am so embarrassed
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I am so embarrassed
| Sun, 05-20-2007 - 2:26pm |
My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 months. It was an intense relationship from the beginning. I have a regular job and he works shifts. I am quite outgoing but because he works odd days and nights we never socialized, and to add to our problems he has a son. To cut a long story short there was not enough adult time. We had a bust up in March, took he clothes and left. We made up a few days later. We have now had another bust up. I was demanding to much of his time without his son. We tried to talk but it ended up in an argument. He walked out the door in a temper, I phoned him and told him to come and collect his stuff because he walked out. When he did come round I realised I didnt want him to leave. He did anyway. I feel we were both to blame.
The next morning I went to his place of residence(it is a shared house), he wouldn't talk to me and phoned the police to warn me to stay away.
Here is the embarrassing bit.My behaviour. I tried to phone, text, email, got my friend to call and text,but still he would not speak or contact me. He blocked me on his email too. So I chose to sit outside his house until he came out. Well that was not a good idea. Nearly got myself arrested. He did phone to tell me that we will not get together again and should I go anywhere near his house when his son was there he would have me arrested.
Here is my question. Why did he get the police involved? If his son is asking why he hasn't seen me then I cant be a bad person. What do you make of this kind of behaviour, when a few days before we were all loved up. How do I get over my embarrassment of my harrassing behaviour? I am feeling very hurt, rejected and lonely, but have stopped the urge to phone or text him for a TWO WHOLE DAYS. has anyone got any advise for me, please.
The next morning I went to his place of residence(it is a shared house), he wouldn't talk to me and phoned the police to warn me to stay away.
Here is the embarrassing bit.My behaviour. I tried to phone, text, email, got my friend to call and text,but still he would not speak or contact me. He blocked me on his email too. So I chose to sit outside his house until he came out. Well that was not a good idea. Nearly got myself arrested. He did phone to tell me that we will not get together again and should I go anywhere near his house when his son was there he would have me arrested.
Here is my question. Why did he get the police involved? If his son is asking why he hasn't seen me then I cant be a bad person. What do you make of this kind of behaviour, when a few days before we were all loved up. How do I get over my embarrassment of my harrassing behaviour? I am feeling very hurt, rejected and lonely, but have stopped the urge to phone or text him for a TWO WHOLE DAYS. has anyone got any advise for me, please.

Ok for one, don't beat yourself up anymore. I won't say we've all been there because we haven't, but some people have been in your shoes and hopefully it was a wake-up call to you on your behavior.
To answer your question as to why he got the police involved, well, maybe he saw a side of you he wasn't aware of and it freaked him out a bit. Maybe you were acting more out of control than you realize. Maybe he doesn't do confrontations well. Any number of different reasons, but ultimately that doesn't matter, you're focusing on the wrong thing. Focus instead on looking inside yourself and seeing why you lost it as badly as you did, why you clung so hard, and where is there an opportunity for you to make an improvement in yourself.
You'll be okay, respect his wishes for zero contact and don't get yourself in trouble.