I can't believe I let this happen AGAIN

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2007
I can't believe I let this happen AGAIN
4
Sat, 06-30-2007 - 1:24am
So I haven't been on this thing in awhile. Basically we broke up In February and we were together for four years (two of which were long distance because he is in the navy). We were "friends" for awhile and then just completely out of nowhere he stopped talking to me and started dating this *Just let me get this out* Ugly Anorexic Giraffe elf looking girl. He told me all of these mean things including that I needed to lose weight and so I cut off contact completely from him. I was doing really well, moving on, having fun etc. I didnt talk to him for over a month. Then out of the blue one day he started text messaging me, then calling me. Turns out this girl was "immature and childish" and he didnt want to hang around her anymore. He began telling me things like "He lost the best thing in his life" and "He pushed away the only person that he ever really cared about" etc. He even told me that he wanted to fly me up to come visit him in August. I stupidly let myself fall for him again and am once again disappointed. He's talking to that girl again. How convienant. I just feel so stupid, so used, so angry. I'm furious. How DARE he play with my head like that. I feel like I just once again put myself out there and he just turned me down AGAIN. He was my best friend, how could he do this to me? This hurts and I'm tired of hurting but I don't know how to get away from him. I know that I'll continue to answer his phone calls, texts, etc. whenever he feels lonely or whatever. Ughhh I hate myself for being this way. How do I stop?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-19-2007
Sat, 06-30-2007 - 9:06am

Emma,

I am in exactly the same place. I feel so stupid and used, and don't know how I could fall for this twice. I am still trying to figure things out, so I don't really have much of an answer at this point, I just wanted to say I totally know what you are going through! I will post any insight I obtain...until then, try to stay strong...*HUGS*

-K

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2007
Sat, 06-30-2007 - 2:45pm
Did you ever hear of the saying "fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me." My advice is no contact. Don't take his calls or reply to text messages. It really helps. He's not worthy of you. Find yourself a nice guy that would never make a fool of you like that! They are out there.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2004
Sat, 06-30-2007 - 9:08pm

Yep, it's hard. I'm in the same boat. My ex pulled the exact same game with me... He had all the right things to say: "We're so good together", "You're the woman I want to be with", "I'd do anything for you"... yada, yada, yada. Three months later he dumped me for the second time, and went back to his previous girlfriend! I just figure the guy doesn't know what he wants and he's not in love with either of us. He's just a game player and he's not going to change. I doubt your ex will change either. I've found that a person with integrity doesn't jerk people around emotionally - SO, DON'T ALLOW HIM TO. You (and I, and everyone else in this position) really do deserve better.

Best Wishes

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Sun, 07-01-2007 - 4:12pm

Hi emma254,


You are not stupid, nor are you a fool. He is.