I can't breathe....

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2007
I can't breathe....
6
Mon, 12-10-2007 - 1:07am
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2007
Mon, 12-10-2007 - 1:34am

Hello. Since you've tried breaking up with him, I assume before you

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2007
Mon, 12-10-2007 - 2:04am

mmm. This is probably glaringly obvious, but have you mentioned it to him? Liked sat down and talked to him about what you need and miss in this relationship? Sometimes it's hard to read your mind if you 'seem' happy and content.

To quote an example. So my last last ex, we'll call him G. He's big on the prince charming/helpless damsel in distress relationship. Which is SO not me unfortunately. But I fell into the role to please him, and when I moved on to my latest ex, I fell back into it thinking it was what 'guys' find attractive. How wrong I was. My ex found it clingy and needy and a farcry from the independent sassy chick I was when we first met. 'course instead of letting ME know that this whole damsel in distress wasn't what he was looking for so I could fix it, he burst it all out at the end and unceremoniously dumped me. But to be fair, he always told me it was cute and how much he loved it. bleh.

Anyways, it COULD be what your bf's last gf expected and he naturally expected you to be the same. Unless you let him know that you appreciate he's thinking of you, that he's a gentleman, but that's not the kind of stuff that you need or want. 'Perfect' does not mean that it's 'perfect' for you. You have to define your own perfect. Capische?


- There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who won't anymore, and who always will. So don't worry about people from your past - there's a reason they didn't make it into your future.
- There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who won't anymore, and who always will. So don't worry about people from your
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Mon, 12-10-2007 - 7:10am

Welcome to the board lattebug,


I think it's a good thing to tell him what you told us.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2007
Mon, 12-10-2007 - 11:45pm

Thank you for your reply. You hit the nail on the head and we both need to move on. I have

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2007
Tue, 12-11-2007 - 10:26am

No matter what time you break up with him, he will end up being crushed. It's inevitable.

And I bet you know deep down that you cannot keep this thing dragging along just because he made all these plans and you're afraid to break them. There's always a way to get around things. He can go skiing with his buddies instead of you.

There's something that struck me when you were explaining how much he did for you, and then the outbursts he would have. They indicate a sort of possessiveness and control he wants to have over you. I'm sure he's not doing this on purpose, but in a way, by him doing everything for you he establishes a sort of dependency on your part. If you feel uncomfortable in this relationship, get out and move on sooner than later. By postponing the breakup, you'll increase your anxiety day by day and he'll think you love him more day by day.

Good luck to you!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Tue, 12-11-2007 - 1:50pm

Hi latterbug,


While reading your post about the way he lays out your vitamins, etc.