I can't get over this.....please give me some advice.
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|Wed, 12-22-2010 - 10:18am|
So long story short.....I was engaged. 6 weeks before the wedding, he called it off. I left. This was 4 months ago. For the last 2 months, we have been "seeing eachother." He has said over and over that he doesn't want to "be in a relationship" b/c of some stressful things going on in his life. I understood and we were on again/off again. I'd get mad that he wouldn't commit, we would break up, he would come back...this happened 3 times.
All of a sudden, last week, he started not answering my calls and and stopped coming over to see me. 3 days after this started, he broke things off, for good. He said that he loved me but couldn't handle a relationship. I said ok. Well, he still text me for the next few days and out of nowhere, Saturday, he text me saying he loved and missed me and wanted to come over so he could spend the night and hold me b/c he "needs me in his life". I didn't. We text back and forth for 5 hours that night then I never heard from him after that.
Last night, I found out thru a friend that he has been "seeing" his newest employee (he is her boss, she is his secretary). This is the 5th secretary he has "dated" since he has worked there (7 years). I used to work for him too. I looked at her fb and found out that it was true. They are officially "in a relationship". I confronted him via text last night and all he said was "leave me alone".
Today, I called him and he admitted it. She started there about 3 weeks ago and he's liked her ever since. They are in fact "together" and have been sleeping together. I asked why he couldn't be with me but can be with her? His exact words were "I can't explain it. There is something about her. She isn't you. She is better. She is beautiful, smart and a great woman. I just have to be with her. She is amazing." He went on to say that I tried "manupulating him while he was vulnerable" (his dad is dying of cancer). He also went on to say that they have already slept together and she has met his family. I asked if she knew about us and he said that he told her everything last night on the phone. Appartently, she said that "it is ok. I am falling for you and want to be with you. We will work through this and anything." That sounds pretty heavy for only dating for a week.
He told me that I needed to get over him and this was a good way but that he was trying to spare my feelings. I can't believe it. What hurts is how he couldn't be with me or commit to me....but he has with some new employee that he has only known for a month. To make matters worse, she is gorgeous and apparently, better than me in so many ways.
How do I get over him? Over the lying, cheating and hurt? He says he didn't "cheat" on me but it is obvious that they were seeing eachother and hanging out together before we split up. He even admitted to hanging out with her on the nights that I couldn't get ahold of him. He has been so cold and heartless about it all. He wants absolutely nothing