I Deleted Him, Just Now
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I Deleted Him, Just Now
| Thu, 07-26-2007 - 11:58pm |
I just posted the previous message and I have posted before on my situation and my BIGGEST thing (which is only like THE #1 RULE) was breaking the N.C. rule. So, it's like HUGE that I deleted him from my IM list and blocked him...even though, I really didn't have to block him, cuz he'll never try to IM me after last night. But, I blocked him, because I don't want to know if he tries to IM me or not. I'm sure some of you out there will understand how BIG of a thing this is for me. I'm shaking, typing this, cause it was hard to do. So, I'm going to start counting my N.C. days (and you guys & God help me) and try to get past 3 days (which is my pitiful sad record).
Tina
Tina

I know it's a big deal. So congratulations! It's a big step.
After receiving an e-mail from him last week that re-broke my heart (he actually told me that he was feeling better about himself since I wasn't around and that me dropping by/contacting was starting to "frighten him), I made a similar move this week. Not only did I delete him from my phone, I, too, blocked his e-mail...only to have him forward the message onto me at work! He ended up apologizing for hurting me, for making me cry, etc.This was the 1st apology to me since we broke up 2mos. ago! But, still no apology about how HE contributed to the end of our relationship! (He had blamed me for the whole thing.)
I was good and didn't reply. 2 days went by (yesterday), and I received ANOTHER e-mail from him asking me "if I hated him and that he certainly doesn't hate me. He thinks about me still and wonders how I am doing." Really? Does he?
WHAT IS THE DEAL WITH THAT? He made it VERY clear that I was to have NO CONTACT with him and in the same week, he e-mails me asking if I hate him? Why would he do this?
I was really trying to move on, after my begging and pleading for him to work on our relationship didn't work, I needed drop all ideas of hope, and move on for my own sanit. HIS contacting me, just brought all the feelings out again.
Why do guys do this? Does knowing I feel horrible make him feel good? Or does the fact that I might " hate him" bruises his ego and feeds into his insecurities?
Please help. I posted on here a couple of weeks ago with my initial breakup situation. Thanks.
That the women do all the things necessary so they do not contact him, and he cannot contact her, then the bastard contacts them. I think it is an ego thing. They have to contact you, because they cannot believe you 'deleted & blocked" them. I think they have a natural controlling attitude, that you will always be available to him, even if he doesn't want you.
I don't EVER seem to have that problem. In my relationships (and break-ups), more than not, the 'sterotypical' advise and actions that I take, do not result in the 'stereotypical' results and reactions that others get. Me deleting him, was just so I could not torture myself, knowing he knows I'm on-line and he DOESN'T contact me. Now I ALWAYS appear off-line to him. He MAY try to contact me, via e-mail, and then he would realize he's blocked, but I highly doubt he'll ever know, because he'll never try. See, of course, you can see how that can make me feel bad, because I'm not even worth "being kept hanging" to him. Sure, it helps me forget about him faster....maybe. But intil I am past the hard part, I have that 'extra' feeling of being thrown away and immediately forgotten....like the last 6 1/2 months didn't exsist. I WISH TO GOD THEY NEVER DID.
Tina
Tina Marie