I don't understand this. $.02, Anyone?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-13-2006
I don't understand this. $.02, Anyone?
2
Thu, 09-20-2007 - 5:31pm

I've been posting on here the last week. My husband and I divorced (it was my decision) after a year and a half. We started dating again and last week decided to take a break because we both don't trust eachother right now. The break was supposed to be exclusive and we would see how we felt in a couple weeks.

Since we were married, we have joint accounts and whatnot. I started separating them and so we have had to send brief emails to each other asking the other person to do something like transfer money or whatever. Other than that, I've been very good at no contact. I've been treating it like a breakup because I don't want to end up thinking everything is ok only to find out he doesn't want to see me anymore.

This morning he sent 2 emails during the 5am hour (he is NOT a morning person, so I am guessing he isn't handling this well either) asking about general bill stuff. I replied to that stuff and said that I need to know if we are still exclusive and on a break or if we are over because if we are over, we need to begin the process of getting my name off the mortgage and getting eachother's names off car loans. He has not responded. So at this point I don't know whether or not to try and contact him so he starts the refinancing process on the house (I cant buy anything myself until I am off the loan) or just to leave him alone and continue no contact and still assume we are on an exclusive "break."

I am so confused by all this. Its weird that he hasn't responded, but I don't know how to read that. Cause if we are over, I need to know. Or if we want to continue to work on things, I need to know. I don't know how to interpret this no-reply thing.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 09-20-2007 - 6:24pm

Is there any particular reason you cannot wait until the end of your agreed upon break to figure those things out?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2007
Thu, 09-20-2007 - 6:48pm

I agree with Sheri.


He's probably not responding because he doesn't know. And he doesn't want to say anything definite right now. You should wait it out for a little bit and not rush into anything.


If it's a break don't rush it into a break up ! Do you want to break up? Then let him know. It doesn't seem the case and I'm sure he probably doesnt want to break up.


I would try to ease the pressure off. Take your time.


Good luck!