I ended it so why I am so sad?
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I ended it so why I am so sad?
| Mon, 09-06-2004 - 10:25pm |
My boyfriend and I of 2 1/2 yrs broke up a little more than a month ago. We shared an apartment together and tonight I moved out. He moved out several weeks ago. In the first two weeks of break up we talked a lot and then all of the sudden he told me he can't talk to me or see me at all. He said if I need him to contact him, but we cannot be my best friend. This really hurt me, because he is my best friend. I broke up with him, because he wants us to be together, but he doesn't want kids or marriage. I want to get married and have kids more than anything. I just had this moment where I was so heartbroken he wouldn't make any commitment to "someday" that I just ended things. It was the hardest decision I have ever had to make. I love him with everything in me and I want to be with him more than anything, but to do that I have to sell my wants short. Then I wonder why marry if you can't marry your best friend and the one you love? I am so confused by this. I tried to talk to him about this, but he said, "I refuse to have this conversation with you about our relationship." I don't know what to do.
I miss him so much that after all this time I cry myself asleep. I talk to his friends and it sounds like he is doing really well. I know how devastated he is that I broke up with him, but he said he understood. I'm so confused. Can anyone give me any insight as to why I'm feeling this way?
I miss him so much that after all this time I cry myself asleep. I talk to his friends and it sounds like he is doing really well. I know how devastated he is that I broke up with him, but he said he understood. I'm so confused. Can anyone give me any insight as to why I'm feeling this way?
Thank you, April

You will find someone who can fulfill your needs and has the same dreams that you do. I know it is hard to believe but it is def the truth and one day you will realize it too. Just know that the way you are feeling is completely normal. What hurts me so much abt my breakup is that I feel I am losing my best friend in the world, and I am. I am sure you feel that you are too. It hurts and if it didnt then there would be something to worry about !!! Stay strong. It will get better. {{HUGS}}
Be strong; it is hard to choose what is right for you, but ultimately it's BEST. You will never be 100% happy in a relationship that only gives you back 75%....
Good luck --
I know it must have been a tough decision to decide to end things. But if he is dead-set against the one thing you want more than anything....then you ended it for the right reasons. I think what you're feeling is normal. You still love him so of course you're still sad. Just because you ended things doesn't mean you don't feel bad and grieve just as if he were the one that ended it. I think getting out of the apartment you shared and away from the memories of all the good times will help you heal. This will take time but you will eventually heal and be able to move on. Good luck and keep us posted!!! Feel free to post here anytime!!
I have never posted here before & was getting ready to... & then I read your post. Our situations may be different... but I ended it & I am sad too! I hate this!!! I don't know that I have any words of wisdom, other than the typical "it'll get better in time", but just know that you are not alone.
Sara