i feel like dieing
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i feel like dieing
| Fri, 12-28-2007 - 6:05pm |
Hi Everyone,
This is my first time posting on this board, and thought that maybe someone out there can give me some insight.
| Fri, 12-28-2007 - 6:05pm |
Hi Everyone,
This is my first time posting on this board, and thought that maybe someone out there can give me some insight.
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Did you send the email????
The way your feeling is normal, but you got to look at this: you only knew him for 5 mos, there wasn't much time to get to know this person, or really invest alot of energy and love into a relationship with him. So, just imagine if you were with him for years, and he did that too you?? It happens all the time,
Daisy
I also spent non stop time with my ex- 3 years- and the other post is right, what if you had put in that kind of time and had him hurt you?
I'd like to suggest some counseling again. If you have had a series of bad relationships, staying in bed is not going to help you. You need to understand why you tend to find yourself in these situations- as well, you need to see that you are a wonderful person and deserve better.
I hope you will make a call tomorrow and see if someone can talk to you after the holiday. 2008 should be about the new you! Make that call and start a new beginning for yourself instead of waiting for this guy to call you and think he is going to make everything better.
Hi daisy,
I'm the CL of this board and I'm sorry I didn't get to your and other folks' posts oer the past couple of days earlier, my comp up and croaked and I had to go get it fixed, took a few days.
Anyway, I see you've received some amazing support and input from some of the ladies who've been on here a little while, and for that I'm very thankful. It's up to you now to follow what's in your best interest, and to know what that best interest is. We can help, we can't do it for you. I zeroed in on your post first because of the post title. Breakups are some of the most emotionally devastating events that can happen in a person's life and because of that, I can't afford to take it lightly when somene indicates even in passing that they'd prefer to die because they fell they can't deal with the emotional fallout that comes after a breakup. I'll add some hotline numbers for you. Last year right around this time someone on this board did actually decide the pain wasn't worth enduring, and she left behind three lttle kids. So you can imagine how your post jumped out at me.
National Suicide Hotline 1-800-Suicide (1-800-784-2433)
This is for you:
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-rlbreaking&msg=23626.1
Even though it's about "space" it can apply in hindsight after a breakup. Points 2, 3, and 4 directly relate to your situation. If you've been spending all your time together, even if one or maybe both of you think it's cute, it's actually quite unhealthy, unbeknownst to you; if you never argue or even disagree, that's not necessarily a good sign, that means someone is taking a step back, feeling unable or unwilling to show their true selves; if you do everything together, there's nothing new or interesting to bring back to the relationship, neither partner is growing as an individual and as a person.
Eventually, someone gets bored of these situations in the relationship, and even if they're been trying very hard to keep it going because "they never fight and they spend all knds of wonderful time together where everything is just perfect," and from the outside things seems fantastic--- in actuality something is usually missing, and when that realization becomes unbearable, that's when they "suddenly break up from out of nowhere," and it ends up that they "blindside you," because you "never saw it coming." I'm sorry, but that is the case I've seen over and over for almost two years of hosting this board. The stories, each one heartbreaking, are rarely much different. My own breakup story isn't much different from that.
Even though you asked for someone not to do this, I'm going to anyway: These things DO in fact happen for a reason. Usually very good ones that don't show themselves to us until much later. The reason isn't in the past, it's in the future, that's the trick. You've been dating toxic people for a long time, drunks, abusers, and junkies from your own description-- this one guy proved to you you can in fact, date someone much different from that. Good guys are out there for you to date. This one didn't work out and I'm very sorry about that, but that does NOT mean no one else ever will. Now you know you have options in the good-guy category, you don't have to date only the losers anymore. Girl, you're worth it, we all are. The day YOU start believing it, it WILL begin to happen for you, but not a minute before.
So here's your hug and a swift kick to the tuckus (cuz that's just how I am around here): Get your sweet booty out of bed! Life's too damn good to waste it with your head under the covers.
Keep posting, I have some helpful articles for you to read in the Resources section at the bottom of this board's main page. Especially Zen of Doing Nothing and How to Get Over Your Breakup. Let me know when you've read those.
All the best,
Daisy
I dont think you have angered anyone. We all understand, we have all been there. We just want to help you get thru it. Trust me, we have all walked in your shoes.
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