I feel like a total jerk

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2007
I feel like a total jerk
11
Sat, 05-26-2007 - 7:44pm

So, here I am thinking I am ready to move on after only three months.

I go on two dates with this really nice girl and we have a terrific time.

Then, during the third date, I start feeling like I am comparing everything the date does with my ex. By the end of the date, I feel like I miss my ex too much and I can't see myself going forward with the new girl if I keep thinking of my ex.

We were at her house, and I really didn't know what to do, and so I told her I am sorry but I thought I was ready to date but it feels like I am not.
She tells me to get out so I leave. It all happened in like 30 seconds or so.
Next thing I know, i am driving home and feeling like a total jerk for saying that to her and leaving.
I know she was really excited about being with me and I hurt her big time.

She emailed me this morning and asked what happened. I emailed her that I was sorry but I don't think I am ready to date anyone even though I thought I was. I also said in the email that even though I had a great time with her, I am not ready so I don't want her to get more into me if I am not ready to get more into her. I said it wasn't fair to her.

Now I feel like a total jerk and hurt someone who did not deserve to be hurt.
Today all I keep thinking about is why did I do this and why did I think I was ready?
It makes me feel like I am not a nice person. My ex said to me once, that I have to force myself to be nice to people.

Rob

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2006
Tue, 05-29-2007 - 2:00pm

Sure, please remember I'm a neophyte at it, though :)


Keeping in mind that every action, every decision, every thought

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