i have issues
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i have issues
| Mon, 06-18-2007 - 1:17pm |
I will try & make this short. I've been married for 2 yrs (together for 8 yrs) Before we got married I had doubts but went ahead & got married b/c I was afraid & thought to myself things will change. Of course they didn't. My husband is a great man when he wants to be but very controlling & emotional abusive on the other hand. I hardly have an friends, the ones I do have don’t live in the same state so once a year I go to visit & it's been that way since b/f he was in the picture but now I cant go & my family deals with him b/c he has been around for so long. He says that I need to take better care of myself b/c I don’t look the way we did when we met, we'll go months w/o sex & he says it's b/c of work, these are just so reasons for my next part. After being married for a yrs I started to have a affair, that lasted 6-8 months. Something that I'm not proud of but just couldn’t stop. My husband found out, the affair stopped & we started going to counseling (I shouldn't say we b/c he went twice ) he said that I was the one with the problems, needed help & meds. So again the problems of us got a quick fix & now 1 yrs later they are back to the same way. Another issue "the affair" I can say that it was & still is the hardest thing for me. I know it's wrong but I can't help the way that I feel. When it comes to him, I'm an emotional wreck. I should feel with way about my husband but I don't - I never have. I just felt so "me" around him & now I'm back pretending & I hate myself for it. I've tried leaving but I just feel bad, the emotional arguments, the disappointment, didn’t want it to be about my affair (not fair or solving anything by running to another man) but most of all it's my fear. I'm starting to get worried & just don’t know what I can do to face my fear & find the courage to move forward w/ my life & be happy.
Signatures On
| Mon, 06-18-2007 - 8:47pm |
Do you love your husband and want to spend the rest of your life with him?
