I have turned a corner

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2007
I have turned a corner
10
Tue, 01-29-2008 - 8:14am

I am not sure if it is permanent or not but I have really turned a corner the past couple of days.

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 01-29-2008 - 11:33am

So glad to hear it!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2007
Tue, 01-29-2008 - 2:38pm

Congrats to you!
How long did it take for you to get to this place?
I'm waiting for this moment.

WOuld you say it got worse before it got better?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2007
Wed, 01-30-2008 - 4:43pm
Its been about 3 months since the breakup (I am by no means completely over it, since I know I am not ready to start dating again).
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2005
Wed, 01-30-2008 - 5:36pm
Glad to hear things are looking good for you! I've turned many corners, but I've had a rough couple of days...for no particular reason. I'm just really sad...

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2007
Thu, 01-31-2008 - 10:25am

Hi mdrsfr -

I hope you're doing better than when you guys first broke up.
I've noticed that you've been on this board but it seems your still struggling.
:(

How are things going?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2005
Thu, 01-31-2008 - 1:58pm

Honestly it just goes up and down all the time. So I can go through a period when I feel pretty good and all is well, then a period of anger and sadness. I guess that’s "normal" right? I do all the things I'm "supposed" to be doing. Journaling, blogging, working out, joining classes, meeting new people, taking care of myself...but there are still times where it's very hard.


I think because it was so unexpected for me...and our relationship was healthy, felt good, moving forward, etc. I was blindsided. I did not see it coming. In the five years we were together, I thought this man was the man I would spend the rest of my life with. I do not thing the "one" passed me by and I will not meet anyone again. I know that will probably happen eventually. Believe me, I WANT to move on. I'm not trying to hold on to the past at all. I hate that he occupies my mind all the time. I'd rather have it not be that way.


But it does seem that other friends of mine who have gone through a breakup have moved on faster than me. Maybe it's an illusion. People seem to think I'm going great too...till they catch me in my office crying and they look pretty surprised.


 

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2005
Thu, 01-31-2008 - 8:24pm

rossjack ~

Thanks for your post!

I admit some days I really feel sad. But, when I get that way, I try not to beat myself up. I just try to recall how did being involved with him enhance my life? Other than major discounts on airfare (he works for an airline).... it didn't!

Admittedly, it hasn't been a month yet and I am cruising this message board because I am feeling kinda down tonight. The breakup (with no closure!) still smarts. However, some days I find I feel pretty good! Some days, I hardly even think about him. I don't even think I am in danger of drunk dialing!! There is a small issue I need to address & hopefully overcome.... I have been disciplined about working my anger out on the elliptical but loving on Ben & Jerry every night!! :(

I remain hopeful that I will feel better and stronger than I ever did before. I tell myself it's because I have grown up through this break up. But...I don't know. It might just be that he wasn't really "all that" after all!! Hopefully..it is a bit of both.

Even though there are dark moments, days & night still ahead, I know I won't die. Just have to ride it out and embrace the times when I am feeling really strong and keep reminding myself daily that I'll be just fine. In due time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2007
Fri, 02-01-2008 - 12:31am

mdrsfr --

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2007
Fri, 02-01-2008 - 12:35am
congrats to you. you seem to be on the right track, and happier than before. your doing lots of healthy stuff (i'm trying to get there). good for you on the progress
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2005
Fri, 02-01-2008 - 1:30pm
I'm not sure a counselor would tell me anything I don't already know, or am not already doing. It's just going to be the time thing...pure and simple. :(