I just don't know what to think

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2007
I just don't know what to think
2
Sat, 05-19-2007 - 1:02pm

Yesterday, an email I sent to him, saying I was coming over (he is 70 miles away). It had been somewhat planned, this weekend I'd be in his city. The night before he'd been all excitement, telling me he'd bought be tiramisu and pears...

Yesterday, he responded to my email by saying that his apartment was a mess, then another email saying a guy he works with had asked him to go to the gym last night, then another email asking whether I'd wanted to visit my parents that day (they live in the city he lives in). I started feeling like he was throwing up roadblocks, so I just said in an email that the visit was starting to feel like a hassle so I'd just stay here.

Then he calls me. From work (I was at hom yesterday). He was really sharp with me, asking me what my problem was, whether I needed a "gilded invitation" to come over," and on and on, cutting stuff. I finally said that I didn't think the conversation was appropriate while he was at work. He called me a "saint" in this condescending tone and wouldn't end the conversation, he said "we're having this conversation now, or we're not having another ever aga...". And that's when I hung up.

He called me six times in a row, I didn't answer. He called me a half hour later, left this message saying he was out of work, we could talk. I waited an hour and called him back, only to have him say that he hadn't wanted to say anything after all. I said he'd called six times so it seemed like he had. He got angry at that.

There's more, but I'm not goinng to lay it all on you. I'm just stung, and hurt. All of this after so many words from him about loving me and wanting to be together and wanting to make it work and understanding how he'd been to me in the past and wanting to change that. I don't know if I'm overreacting, or if there's something I should do or say. I feel so horrible. I feel like I did three month ago when I didn't speak to him for over a month, before he came back into my life again with all of these (seemingly) real changes. I feel like a fool, but I feel so completely hurt. Do you think there is anything I should say or do? Why was he like this...?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Sat, 05-19-2007 - 1:29pm

Hi loveandsomeverses,


Sorry he behaved that way. Seems he was putting up blocks without maybe realizing it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2006
Mon, 05-21-2007 - 1:05am

I think you read way too much into what he was saying and then it took a nasty downward spiral from there. Truly simple as that.

Everything happens for a reason. Find what that is for this, don't guess or assume what it might be ahead of time.

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