I just want to breathe
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| Sat, 03-04-2006 - 11:37am |
For seven months I put everything I had into the relationship with my two days ago ex. All I do is cry. I know he's not mature enough yet for a relationship, but I just want him back. He was so unemotional, first moving out and telling me everything was going to be okay and the only reason he was leaving is so he could get his money straight. Then I cried because I had this horrible feeling he wasn't coming back and when i'd vocalize it he's just tell me everything was going to be better, and everything was going to be fine and he'd only be gone two months and he'd come over every other day and call every night before he went to bed. This was two wensdays ago he told me he was moving, sunday he moved out, and that monday he came over, but left early. Tuesday he was sick and didn't come over, and then wensday I called him and he told me he needed time to think, because he was tired of all the " bullcrap ". Thursday I called him crying and told him i'm able to give him the time he needs, but that I needed to at least know whatever the problem was we would try to work it out. He told me to just let it go, no emotion, nothing, and I broke down even further and asked him how the hell not even a week ago he loved me and everything was going to be fine, and now we were done just like that after seven months, and he said......and here's what kills me " i love you, i'm just not in love with you. " all I want to do anymore is sleep. i haven't ate in 4 days, and i cry so hard that I end up making myself sick and then collapsing on the bathroom floor only to cry some more.
I don't think I can handle this.
