I need help
Find a Conversation
| Wed, 07-13-2005 - 10:23am |
Hi there,
This is the first time I am posting a message online. I would really really like some help. It was great to find out that there was aplace for people like me. I have been in a relationship for 3 years. From the very start we have faced opposition from his parents about our marriage. But both of us tried and tried to make them see our point. I also had to work on my parents who have been incredibly supportive but are now starting to get panicky about my wedding. Both sides even met but still, his parents are completely opposed to the wedding!
About 2-3 months ago, he told me he had doubts about whether he could face up to his parents. But we worked on this together. He even called up my dad and told him that he was ready for an enagagement even if his parents didnt come to it. Then today (8 days before I leave for home....to get engaged) he said that he cant hurt his parents in this way.
I dont know what to do!!! its 8 days to facing my parents! if i tell them about this, they will (very resaonably) ask me to get over him. In fact, I have a feeling that I might even be engaged to some one else by the time summer is over! You know why? Not because my parents are forcing me to but because I know they want it and theres nothing else for me to fight them for.
Should I fight to keep him? Should I try to convince him that we are perfect for each other and that we will work and work to get his parents to accept us? But this territory has been covered so many times over the past few months.........I can fight anybody-my parents, tradition, my own longings to get married...........but how do I fight him? Its like the enemy in your own backyard...........
pls help me with what to do- i love him to bits. in the past when things got bad, i really thought abt what my life will be without him ...with someone else. I dont like it. We were friends before we started going out, we are soooo close i feel like we are one person. How can I ever be like that with someone else? i want to fight for our future soooo bad!!! but then i think, even if i convince him now what if he ditches me at the enagement? But I dont want to spend the rest of my life soaked in tears and emotionally barren................
pls help.

Pages
i was reading your replies and i couldnt help but think more about my situation. I am indian also.. i am dating another indian guy of a different relegion..we have been together for 2.5 years and he's 24 and im 21. i am pretty sure that we are not gonna end up together because he comes from a very strict family and he cant even go out coz of his parents. my parents are not that strict and for my happiness would be willing to accept my bf. i know in my head this probably would never work out coz i can just picture him leaving me once his parents pressure him to get married. but my stupid self keeps thinking he wont do that..coz how can u just leave a person after so long without a fight? i am so confused, i dont know wht to do. and oh on top of that, he just moved like 1000 miles away. so im dealing with a long distance relationship too. is this all worth it?
please help
Pages