I still can't eat...

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2007
I still can't eat...
9
Mon, 01-08-2007 - 3:05pm

Maybe some of you have some suggestions? It's been a week since the break up and I still cannot manage to swallow anything. I've lost 11.5 pounds. Not that it doesn't feel good when my pants fall down... lol

Anyhow. I tried a smoothie today thinking that it might help. I don't feel hungry. My tummy isn't rumbling or anything and it's scaring me a lot. I started at the smoothie but just couldn't get it past my lips. My favorite food is bacon and the smell of it this morning gagged me.

this is ridiculous. Not sleeping is bad enough, but now eating too?

any ideas?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-08-2006
Mon, 01-08-2007 - 3:17pm

Not eating is not taking care of yourself and right now you should be taking even better care of you. Are you not able to keep food down or are you just not interested in eating? If you can't keep it down it may be time to see the doctor. If you are not hungry then maybe a little mind over matter is in order. Try eating something even if you don't feel like it. As far as sleeping, a mild over the counter sedative may help, but if the problem persists you may need to ask a doctor about giving you something to help you sleep. Start doing small things to take care of yourself, like warm baths and candles or indulging in a guilty pleasure (like buying a new outfit) Of course make sure you do not go overboard (all things in moderation).

Hugs,
YG

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2007
Mon, 01-08-2007 - 3:49pm

Really I guess it's a bit of both. Today has been a good day until now. I look good, I came to work, I dressed up and even wore makeup which is something I rarely do. I was in a good mood and high spirits... then I started to realize that he hasn't called. He hasn't emailed. I want NC... but I miss him so much that it's killing me.

So, I tried eating some broth but I keep throwing it up over and over. Normally, I don't react badly to stress... not like this. I like food, good food. I don't eat a lot of junk or snacks. And, I thought maybe jello... broth... even chocolate would be something. I had a peppermint lifesaver today. Somehow I just want to eat. I WANT to be hungry. I WANT to be TIRED. I want to sleep.

Maybe I haven't cried enough and I need some more of that to get him out of my system?

It's just SO hard. I'm just so heartbroken. Now I understand why old people are said to sometimes die of broken hearts. I know this won't kill me... but it's not helping me to feel very strong right now.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-08-2006
Mon, 01-08-2007 - 4:02pm

It seems like you are still in shock from the break up. You mayneed to see your doctor and tell him/her what happened. He/She may give you and RX to get you over the hump. Counseling would also be a good idea to help talk out your anger and frustration.

YG

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2007
Mon, 01-08-2007 - 4:10pm
Ive been there, Actually I am there, Today was the first time I actually swallowed anything in last few days...well exactly a week today. My body never seemed hungry and I wasnt able to eat anything because it was like I was already full. But it gets better, try to remove yourself from where you feel the worst. Once you are in an environment where you wont think about it, ull end up eating. You just have to stop thinking about eating, and just do it. Engage yourself in conversation with someone and just try picking at your food. Once you start eating a little bit at a time, your body will remember that it WANTS to eat lol..it just gets easier from there...good luck
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2006
Tue, 01-09-2007 - 11:06am
oh gosh, i am so sorry, i have been there! any food that is not completely bland and flavorless made me so sick and i couldn't smell anything without getting so nauseous, nothing. i couldn't hold anything down. please take care of yourself. i was able to drink smoothies, even if you can only drink a little, get one with a vitamin boost. try to drink orange juice or a naked juice or something with lots of vitamins in it so that your body is getting at least some nutrients, chicken broth is good too. this went on for me for 3 weeks, my clothes were falling off too and people at work were asking me how i lost so much weight so quickly. i couldn't explain. after about 10 days of this i went to the doctor and she gave me some anxiety meds to help me and like i said, after about 3 weeks, it went away and i was slowly able to get back to my normal eating habits. that helped me to sleep too. you must take care of yourself, you don't want to get sick on top of this. please know that your reaction is normal and you will get through it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2005
Fri, 01-12-2007 - 11:16pm
I know how you feel, Im going through the same thing. Ive lost 8 lbs and I cant seem to eat anything. Its awful. I feel week and tired. Im not sure what the heck is going on. My b/f 2 yrs recently broke up with me and I have been so miserable since. Let me know if you find anything that works to regain your strength and ability to eat.
Thanks
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2007
Sat, 01-13-2007 - 12:41am

I'm eating! I've gained a pound and I'm sleeping...

Here's the trick... I guess it is anyhow. Smile. Don't spend so much time thinking about the bad, think about the good in your life. Share your wisdom, do something nice for someone just because it feels right. Even if that person is yourself.

Personally... I will tell you that NC is nearly impossible for us because this break up is more like a divorce than a reg. breakup... and we didn't live together. But, as we put away our details... the contact becomes less frequent.

I know tonight that he is hurting. He is hurting a LOT. And, as his friend it is painful to know that. But being dumped wasn't on my priority list for the year, and so I need to just maintain as little contact as possible with this man, who I will deeply love and admire for the rest of my life; just differently.

The further away from the break up I get... the more I begin to realize that this is good for me. And, I don't think that we will ever reconcile. The funny thing is that our relationship was GOOD. But... we really are nothing more than the best of friends.

I'm sorry you are hurting, believe me I understand. But you will come out ok, I know... you hear that all the time and you're so frustrated and tired of people telling you that.
Take it one day at a time. One breath at a time if you have to.

And, love yourself. Forgiveness is the key to happiness...

Contact me anytime :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2006
Sat, 01-13-2007 - 11:49am

I know exactly what you are going through and I went through the same thing right after my breakup last year. What helped me eat, is to go out with friends or family members to my favorite eating places. I found that being surrounded by the ones who truly love me at resturants that I loved going to helped get my appetite back and my mind of my ex. It's being alone that destroyed my appetite. I also have a 6 year old daughter so we would cook meals together and eat together without the TV on.

In regards to sleeping, this will take some time but what helped me was getting up at 5:15 every morning and running on my treadmill while I watched a funny movie (stay away from the romance movies, they will just bring you down). By the time 10:00 rolled around that evening, I was sleeping like a baby. Excerise does wonders for the appetite and helps you sleep better. I would recommend that over drugs anyday.

Good luck and I do wish you the best during this difficult time. We have all been through this and are here to help.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2007
Sat, 01-13-2007 - 11:58am

Thanks :)

I cannot believe that I found this board. While I knew from experience that I was not the only one who has ever gone through this, I needed to SEE it again I guess.

I am eating again, and I have been going out with friends as much as possible (with three kids!!) and hanging out with my kids. I wish I had a treadmill, because I think that it would be great for stres relief. I did almost get up and go to the gym today, but the not eating caught up with me and I'm now not feeling very well over all.

I too, prefer to turn to exercise and friends before drugs. I don't normally take aspirin. I have been taking the meds prescribed by the doctor, however only when ABSOLUTELY needed. For example, I've been waking at 3 am shaking all over and frightened. That has NEVER happened before. I take a hot shower, put on some classical music and try to meditate to calm myself. If that isn't working, I take 1 of the pills. I've only not been able to do it myself a few times.

Not spending any time with C. has helped, although because he's my friend and he's hurting I just want to give him a huge hug. I don't hate him. But, I do intend to move on with my life.

Today I thought would be harder than it has been so far... I think I'm going to make it!

Thanks so much for your encouragement :)