ISSUE #2
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| Thu, 05-11-2006 - 11:54am |
I met a guy a little over two weeks ago. He is really nice and attractive and he likes me A LOT. However I dont feel like there is enough in common for our relationship to grow together and I really dont want to hurt him or become the "bad" one in the end for knowing this now and ignoring it. Moreover I have a "sense" he may have emotional issues.
So we have seen eachother about 6 or so times. We have NOT been intimate besides for kissing. He is supposed to come over tonight but I dont think I should sustain this anymore with him. I've already met his dad - we went out on his family's boat last weekend.
My birthday is coming up in the next couple of days and Im afraid he is gonna do something for me and if I dont break it off now and Im going to feel soooooooooo bad, as if I'm using him for compoany KNOWING that our thing wont go anywhere.
HELP HELP HELP!!!
BTW - this new guy knows I saw my ex last weekend and knows exactly what happened. I had to tell him because I thought he needed to know what was going on with me. He was understanding and responded by asking me to promise not to hurt him like that again . I said I couldn't promise that but I would never intentionally do anything to hurt him.

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I did it and he was upset and sounded horrible, saying it sounded like he was being dumped. We kept talking. He wants to see me still. OMG, I knew this would happen. I feel soooo bad but I am pretty sure it was the correct decision.
He wants me to call him tomorrow and for us to maybe slow down and c0ontinue to see eachother.
Im now the breaker-upper and its NO EASIER!!! TWO WEEKS!!!!!!!
Uh, he IS being dumped!!! Did you agree to see him again? If so, why would you do that???
Call him back and tell him that it's over and cancel tomorrow's get-together (if you agreed to it)!!!
Sheri
You know the saying "cruel to be kind"?
OK, so I should NOT call him today like I said I would and IF he calls, is the right thing to do NOT pick up? See, I wish my ex handles things more like this with me instead of waiting like a year to start the breakup dance.
I should have left it shorter and sweeter and not stayed on the phone but I felt like this split came out of the blue to him and that maybe I led him on. Its just an example of how people who like eachother and are attracted to eachother may not necessarily work. And if one person knows this then that person should end it, right?
I feel bad about hurting his feelings but I did end up feeling better about it later in the evening, kind of relieved.
hmmm...
I don't know that I wouldn't pick up that first phone call, but then again, I'm coming at it from a perspective of longer than two weeks.
If you agreed to meet him today, then you need to do the right thing and CALL him and tell him that you are not going to meet him and that you no longer want to see him.
Don't leave him hanging if you created any impression that there was any chance the two of you weren't OVER in your phone call with him.
Sheri
I did NOT agree to meet him today, only to call him today.
Regarding meeting him, I only said maybe after the weekend we could meet up.
Ok, thanks, that wasn't how I read your post from last night, but thanks for clarifying. I'm a big believer in keeping one's word, so if you said you would call today, I think you need to contact him (but I could see an argument for not calling him, also).
Do you have his email address? I think sending him an email (rather than calling) and making it 100% clear that you are not interested in seeing him again would be a good idea. Then block him from emailing you back if you think he's going to argue with you.
Sheri
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