Is it really over?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005
Is it really over?
4
Thu, 09-29-2005 - 9:44pm
Okay, so I fell in love with the most wonderful guy in the world...then he told me he needed "a break". I asked him to tell me what he meant by that, and he didn't really know. He works looong hours in the summer, and we saw each other less and less and this summer approached. I asked him if he wanted to be with me, he said yes, but we needed to take a break for the summer. I told him that if he wanted to break up with me, he should say so. He said he didn't want to break up. So, summer's over, and I'm still heartbroken...waiting for him to call. Believe me, I'm not dumb...I can see the writing on the wall. But I love this guy, and I want to be with him so much it hurts. What should I do? Wait for him? Call him? Forget about him? I really think we deserve a second chance. Was the "break" just an excuse, so that he wouldn't have to actually break up with me? HELP!!!!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005
Fri, 09-30-2005 - 9:25am

Oh my..how sad. Well it sounds like the title of that book, "he Just ain't into you"..move on..if he wanted you he could NOT leave your side..let this bad egg GO...

Don't you think you deserve someone WONDERFUL in your life?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2005
Fri, 09-30-2005 - 10:09am

Thats terribly sad! Did he not call all summer? To be honest, taking a break is usually a bad sign. I remember asking for a break once, and it was because I didn't want to see him but I was chicken or scared to end it for good. And I wanted to be by myself, not with him, and sort of in the back of my mind knew he wasn't "it". I learned the hard way not to drag it out, and I finally ended it. That sounds terrible, and I don't know if that is the case here. I know you loved him and it totally sucks to be in love with someone who isn't sure they want to be with you. I do think you deserve some explanation or closure though. You might always wonder and wait, so call him. Be straitforward but don't sound desperate. Maybe you'll get your answer.

Wishing you the best,
Grace

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2005
Mon, 10-03-2005 - 8:29am
I know it's hard - believe me, I've been there. You'd like to walk away but you can't because you care about him. It's so frustrating when guys aren't honest. You deserve to know what he wants. It's worth trying to talk to him and be upfront about your own feelings... even something like, "If this isn't going to work, I need to know so that I can move on." I've found that honesty encourages honesty.
Whatever happens, you can know that you were mature in handling the situation and did what you could to make things work. Hang in there.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005
Mon, 10-10-2005 - 8:14pm
Thanks everyone for your replys. I know in my head that I should move on, but my heart says something completely different. I'm big on closure as well, and I don't have that right now. I was thinking around December I would call him and maybe we could have another chance. Christmas time is so romantice anyway...maybe he'll have a change of heart by then. Yes, I seem like the most pathetic girl in the world right now...but we deserve a second chance to make this work...maybe it will work, maybe it won't...but I'll hate myself if I never try. Any thoughts??