it would've been three years

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2007
it would've been three years
4
Wed, 11-07-2007 - 6:14am

today would have been our three-year anniversary (for those not familiar with my story: together

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2007
Wed, 11-07-2007 - 10:43am

Hugs to you, showtime. Big, big hugs.

I remember after my 3-year relationship I felt like I had lost a limb. That was so hard.

Two and a half years later I am totally over him, I've had other relationships, and we are fortunate enough to be very close friends. I would have never believed I'd even feel whole again in the first months after we split up, nevermind be close to him in amutually satisfying way again.

"three years ago, we were in each other's arms, marveling at what was happening. exactly one year ago, i accepted a job that would've prolonged our distance (although, he promised that he'd move to be with me); before and after that happened, we were in each other's arms, again marveling at everything...."

I can relate. A year ago my love and I were falling head over heals, chasing one another like teenagers on the most fantastic dates, high as a couple of kites, having just so much fun. He also ended our relationship a month and a half ago.

Keep practicing NC. Every 5-7 days I have a bad morning or night, but am mostly feeling calm and good. I started almost immediately after he ended the relationship. It works!

Hugs again!

Claudia

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2007
Mon, 11-12-2007 - 2:57am

it's almost 26 days of no contact, and i still am in so much pain. i'll forget about what happened for a few minutes, but then all of a sudden, it'll come rushing back to me... the impact of remembering is so strong, so sudden, that i lose my breath. my stomach will lurch like i'm falling.


i've been following a lot of the advice i've read here and in books, and also from friends -- keep busy, work on me, realize it's better without him, etc. but nothing's making me feel better. i understand it's a process and that it takes time, but i feel like i was slowly getting better and then have hit a plateau.


most of the time, i'm not stuck in "why?" land, although those thoughts creep up from time to time. now it's just extreme sadness, a loneliness and emptiness that i haven't been able to fully understand or fill.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-22-2007
Mon, 11-12-2007 - 10:26am

I'm sorry that you're still feeling the pain from your break-up, and that today is a really crappy time for you. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers and I hope you are able to find the comfort and peace that you need to get through today.


I wish I had some words of wisdom, but I would feel foolish considering I haven't had a relationship last longer than a year. I just have faith in knowing that things happen for a reason, and that someone who is a better match for me and who will treat me the way I deserve is finding his way to me - I just have to work on healing myself so that I will be ready for him when he enters my life.


Be extra good to yourself today, and recognize that you are making progress with the NC. Way to go! All the best. Take care.


hugs, lisa

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2007
Mon, 11-12-2007 - 12:59pm

thanks for the encouragement.


it's a struggle, but i just have to take it day by day i suppose, and make improvements so my life can be on more solid ground.

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