It's been months, should it bother me?!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2006
It's been months, should it bother me?!
3
Thu, 02-16-2006 - 10:13am

Should it bother me this much?

My boyfriend of 1 year and a half cheated on me with the biggest slut i know, my only enemy in this world. it killed me, i dumped him and afterwards he had sex with her. He claims im the best thing that ever happened to him and he wished he could take it back and all that crap and everyone told me he was a damn wreck and still is. It's been six months im dating someone new, someone who treats me so much better and when i found out they had sex after we broke up it still got under my skin, it's like it hurt, not because i still love him, because i dont but the fact that he did that...ew. My friends tell me its normal that it hurts but i feel guilty, like it shouldn't.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2006
Thu, 02-16-2006 - 10:24am
just a little background info...we were each others "firsts" so that could be why it btohers me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2004
Thu, 02-16-2006 - 1:22pm

"My friends tell me its normal that it hurts but i feel guilty, like it shouldn't."

First get rid of the word guilt. Guilt is an earned feeling of conscience when you've knowingly and intentionally done something wrong. You haven't. You don't feel guilty. You are and feel betrayed. You deemed this guy worthy of trust and you, only to be slapped with the fact that he wasn't worthy and could look you in the eyes and lie and hurt you so deeply and intentionally. You were so betrayed, and that hurts.

I'm so sorry that you found out just how much of a scumbum that guy was *after* you got emotionally involved.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-2005
Fri, 02-17-2006 - 12:38pm

Personally I don't think there is a timeline for when things should or should not bother you anymore.

Nikki