It's getting too much
Find a Conversation
| Wed, 12-06-2006 - 8:22am |
I'm 19 and I broke up a month ago with my boyfriend of nearly 4 years. He wasn't making me happy, he was lazy, didn't make an effort with me at all, was a liar etc. I've accepted that i don't want to be with him and am better off without out him but since i've broke up with him he's basically gone off the rails. He's changed so much.
1. 4 days after we broke up, he has a one night stand with a girl 5 years older than him and they're still meeting up now for sex.
2. we were going to be friends and arranged to meet up for a drink to talk, but he blew me off for another girl.
3. he gets drunk nearly every night
4. he touches up my sisters bestfriend at a party while drunk and people are videoing it on their phones.
Why does this still hurt? I'm not speaking to him anymore, and have started looking after myself e.g. the gym, but it still really hurts hearing things like this. I just want to forget about him but he always seems to be coming back to haunt me. People keep on telling me things about him, and to be honest, i don't really care. I'd rather not know. I can't believe the person he's changed into. When i was going out with him he was nothing like this.
I want to move on completely and be ready for that person who is going to make me happy. I wondered whether anyone has any past experiences of this, encouragement or tips. I really want to get on with my life!
Many thanks XXX

I agree that you should ask people to stop telling you about what he's doing, and don't ask about what he's doing. The less contact you have with him the better. I totally know how scary it is to feel like the person you loved and knew so well isn't at all who you thought them to be. But remember....when MANY guys get out of a long-term, committed relationship, they tend to want to be wild and "sow their wild oats" because, well, they "can" now. It certainly sounds like you are better off without this guy, though. Also, please don't beat yourself up for not being over it or still caring--it's only natural. Hang in there; good things will come your way.
XOXO