It's OVER after 8 years w/ 2 kids

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-07-2007
It's OVER after 8 years w/ 2 kids
1
Fri, 09-07-2007 - 3:40am

Hey guys im glad i found you guys.
My ex just broke up with me 3 weeks ago.
We are originally from Ca and decided to buy a house last year in TX.
Everything was fine when we moved and i got pregnant again with our second child.
I did not have insurance so I decided to move back to Ca for the meantime untill I give birth. I did not see him for at least 4 months and he came and pick us up on december and went back home to TX. After I had my second child I started to have anxiety and Panic Attacks which scared me to death. So we decided to sell the house and move back to Ca to be closer to my family. We decided for me and the kids to go first and he will follow once our house gets sold. So here we are now still trying to sell the house and he is still over in TX.

About 3 weeks ago, i did not get any phone calls and when i do call him he doesnt pick up. It lasted for about 3 days. Then all of a sudded he told me that he wanted us to go our separate ways and he was not happy anymore. His excuses are that I am too dependent on him and that I cant stand up on my own. He basically put it all on me thats why his not happy anymore. He said that he is done taking care of me and the kids and its time for him to take care of himself. (how selfish it that)? I am so shocked and felt like I was hit by a bus. We have a 5 year old and 10 months old baby but we were never married. I asked him if he cheated on me and he said no.

This has been really hard for me and to think that he broke it off over the phone just like that, he could have given me the respect of telling me face to face. I asked why on the phone and he said that if he waited until he got here that he would never do it. He is such a coward. It would have been okay if we have no kids but we do and it has been really hard. Everytime i look at my kids I just cry and cant imagine living my life wihtout him. We do talk almost everyday because Im the one that calls him. This is thing, he is coming back here to Ca and he has no place to stay and asked me if he can stay with me for the meantime while he gets his stuff straight. And I said yes for the kids.

Do you guys think that I should not let him stay with me? And he also told me that he is going out with a girl this tuesday that he met at the bar. He tells me all of this stuff like he is really atracted to this girl and he would like to have sex with her. I am really hurt and I just dont know what to do. Please help!1!

msheartbroken,
Loida

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Fri, 09-07-2007 - 12:36pm

It's all about boundaries.....


::And he also told me that he is going out with a girl this tuesday that he met at the bar. He tells me all of this stuff like he is really atracted to this girl and he would like to have sex with her.


This kind of behavior would be so unacceptable to me.