Its over but there's alot that doesn't make sense as I look back..

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2011
Its over but there's alot that doesn't make sense as I look back..
6
Wed, 08-03-2011 - 12:09pm

The relationship ended about a month ago. I'm over the breakup(don't call and no, I don't want him back)

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2005
He sounds somewhat immature in how he deals with relationships. After several months, the "new" wears off a relationship and that's when things start to become *real*..you're not necessarily always on your best behavior, you're not necessarily always primped to within an inch of your life, you maybe have seen each other's morning routine a few times by now, etc., etc.,

For some people, that's when they really begin to enjoy a relationship, when they can be more relaxed and carefree, not as "on" as before, and for others, this part is not the part they care for. They like the chase, they like the newness, they like the "pre-relationship" part and they bore or tire or just plain don't know how or don't feel like dealing with the rest.

But they feel bad about doing this, feel bad about themselves and don't enjoy that feeling, so they blame pretty much everything in the relationship on the other person and that makes them feel not quite so crappy about themselves, although deep inside they do still feel crappy.

So, here's the deal: You can either buy into his BS about this stuff being any of your fault, or you can thank your lucky stars that you didn't spend one more minute of your pecious time on someone who really didn't know how to appreciate you.

Your choice.

Best,

Myspace Codes

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2011

Thanks for the response..I never once blamed myself!!! I feel people say they want a relationship but they don't really want it because relationships take effort. I agree with your take "on the chase". The chase is always fun but the reality sets in afterward. I also think how stupid to start a relationship with someone and then end it and have to explain that after 5 months, I just wasn't feeling her anymore. He made himself look bad in more ways than one. The whole walking away thing was done twice prior and I wanted him to stay despite problems that I thought could be worked out. He could easily point out that he had issues and flaws. I feel to throw people away because of your own shallow BS is stupid especially if that person was good to you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007

>The chase is always fun but the reality sets in afterward. I also think how stupid to start a relationship with someone and then end it and have to explain that after 5 months, I just wasn't feeling her anymore. <<

a_real_lady, if you'd been listening to him, he wouldn't have had to explain this *again* at 5 months in.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2011

@true.blue.strine-That

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009

Do you know what REALLY doesn't make sense?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2011

To Fissatore...You come off as very abrasive and almost self righteous. There's no need for that at all. We are all human and make mistakes...Even YOU!