Just saw him, need to vent :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2004
Just saw him, need to vent :)
5
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 2:06pm

Hi guys,

Everything was going so well. I was recovering, going with my life on my own, started loving myself again... and this morning, on my way to work, I saw him with her... walking, hugging, laughing...

It just like someone put the knife into my heart again. I think it's really an ego thing more than anything else. Hurts so much over again... And I thought I was doing so much better.
I will be ok, just needed to get it out. Why did I even run into him? WE live close to each other and I try all the time to take the route, or time when I know he is not there, not to run into him. But I guess it's unevitable.... I don't think he saw me, because I made a sharp turn right away not to run into them... Gosh, it hurts!

Thanks for listening.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2003
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 2:22pm
IMO, it'd be best if you stop trying to avoid him and thinking in ways not to run into him. Life is life and you'll run into him at one time or another, you can't run away from him for ever. Focus all your work in yourself rather in what to do when you see him. Love and value yourself more every day and think that you deserve beter and better. He has moved on and doesn't care if he runs into you or not. He's not modifying his life, he's not thinking in what to say or do when he sees you. Where are his red eyes or sobbings for you? There are not, he doesn't care about his past. You're crying over him, but he's not crying over you. He's happy and dating. You don't have to waste tears over a man who doesn't deserve you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2005
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 2:47pm

Hey there again,

I had to respond to your post because I SO know what you're feeling and going thru right now. It puts you right back to square one all over again. And I know it must have been hard and heart wrenching for you to see him with her especially when your break-up was so recent.

I tell you men can be such pricks sometimes. I recently bumped into my ex with his new girl a few weeks ago and I tell you it hurt like hell and made me feel worse than I ever did to see him move on to someone else so quickly. But you'll get over it soon. It will take some time, but you seem like you were doing well up until bumping into him. Jsut continue what you were doing before and try not to think too much of it.

It's painstakingly slow, but I'm on my way there. It will take time....lots. I've been broken up with my ex for 5 months and I'm still not over him nor have I completely moved on. Just take it one day at a time and don't let this encounter stop you from your progress. I'm glad to say that I'm back to my old self and I've been doing so much better. My friends have helped me a lot and I've been trying to keep busy and do my own thing.

It was inevitable bumping into him. It was bound to happen sooner or later, but try not to be so upset about, I know it's easier said than done!!! You know what helped me--keeping a journal of all my thoughts and feelings....it made me realize many things about him, me, and our so called relationship. It put a lot of things in perspective.

I hope you will continue to do all the things that makes you happy and try not to think about him too much.

Keep venting if you have too. I wish you all the best!

J

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2005
Wed, 07-27-2005 - 3:05pm

Hugs Newyork! That sucks running into him with her like that! I remember making a mad dash out of walmart one day, tossing the dog food bag in my hands and racing to the car for a good cry when I saw my ex holding hands with her buying groceries together! But good news is, I made it through that day, and after shopping FoodLion for the next 3 weeks, I'm able to go back to Walmart with my head high. I think you are making great progress, and this feeling too shall pass. I understand avoiding while you are healing, and eventually you won't notice what route you are taking or care if he's on it!! You take all the time you need. have you thought about working out or boxing? Something for stress relief, -or- a large bowl of icecream drenched in choc syrup and whip cream... either or,lol hugs!!

Grace

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2004
Thu, 07-28-2005 - 8:21pm

ccruise2001, nycgirl212, lilgrace76

Thank you so much for your support. I am feeling much better. I just need to remind myself to think more about myself and not about him. He is not in my life anymore. Sometimes it's hard to do, but I know it and try to allow myself to be sad... Ouufff, when will this period end? Counting days...

Thank you!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-2004
Thu, 07-28-2005 - 9:26pm
wANNA HEAR SOMETHING CRAZY..My son will be going to the same college where my ex works and even working in his department. I guess that will drive him crazy because he will always have a constant reminder of me... I knkow that he is dreading it. We had planned this before we broke up. My son is very intraverted and would not talk to my ex about what i am doing. This is going to be a wild 4 years... Hope he can handle it. I think it's funny!!!