kids

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2007
kids
7
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 12:08pm

Hi everyone,


Thanks for all the help I have gotten in this forum.


Some of you may or may not remember, my ex broke up with me about 7 months ago.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2007
In reply to: robp_2181
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 12:50pm

It sounds to me like you were speaking what is true for you. Speaking what is true for you (and your daughter) is always the right thing to do.

She may come back willing to try to find a solution to this issue together, or she may come back and say that what is true for her and her children right now is you cannot be in a romantic relationship that involves interaction with her family. And then, again, you will have to look at what is true for you and your daughter under those circumstances and make a decision about how best to move forward for you.

It sounds to me like you did exactly the right thing.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: robp_2181
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 12:57pm

Hi Rob,


Your daughter is very mature and has at least some idea of relationship workings...and she respects you and your decisions. You should be proud of her.


As for your ex, she probably won't be happy for a long time as long as her kids dictate her dating life.





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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2007
In reply to: robp_2181
Tue, 09-25-2007 - 2:33pm

Thanks Carrie


Other people that I have talked to, tell me the same thing.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2006
In reply to: robp_2181
Wed, 09-26-2007 - 10:10am

I'm sorry Rob, but I still think she's being manipulative. Somehow, all her relationship issues and problems with you have been because of her kids, so she's not taking any blame or responsibility for her actions at all. I'm thinking that the real reason her kids have "issues" with you is because they've seen how she treats you, and the incessant back and forth over the past however many months gets to be too much, even for kids.

Not sure why you let her back in so easy after her one call, but I guess you had hope that was greater than logic at the moment ;-) No worries, we've all done some questionable things at some point or another in our relationships. What did the poet say? "Love is the triumph of imagination over reason."

I'm just wondering if she actually enjoys having this power over you, this power to make you jump at will and then to send you crashing back down to earth on a whim. I wonder if she gets her little thrill from that. Her whole, "You can't go to fam functions or be around my kids" supports my little theory.

Best of luck, stay far far way from her, she's messing with you now,

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2007
In reply to: robp_2181
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 9:30am

Thanks Sandra


Yesterday was an interesting day.

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: robp_2181
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 12:07pm

She does seem like a piece of work, that's for sure.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2006
In reply to: robp_2181
Thu, 09-27-2007 - 1:33pm

And somehow she sucked you in yet again. Hopefully that was the last time. The only one who can decide how many times you'll let this happen is you.

....."I'm just wondering if she actually enjoys having this power over you, this power to make you jump at will and then to send you crashing back down to earth on a whim. I wonder if she gets her little thrill from that... Best of luck, stay far far way from her, she's messing with you now."..... My other post still applies, even more strongly now.

Go back and re-read whatever materials you have from that weekend retreat you took some time back, I think you could use some re-focusing efforts. Remember life doesn't just happen to us, it's a product, a result of our choices, decisions, and actions.

Best of luck,

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