Leaving with 3 kids....

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2007
Leaving with 3 kids....
3
Mon, 08-27-2007 - 12:47am

Ok so I've been with this guy for over 6 years...I have a 13 year old that isn't his that basically stays with my mom cause they don't get along and he says rude things to my son..I have 2 children with him a 3 1.2 year old which I got pregnant with right when we were moving in together not knowing I was pregnant at the time of the move...I also have a baby that just turned 2 on friday..which he didn't want..he made that clear by saying for me to have an abortion but, I refused! He has treated my 2 year old different at some point almsot like he wasn't his in a way...I HATE living with him...We really aren't together your lucky we even talk to eachother...But, right now I just don't see a way out...only cause of money..Has anyone else been in the place I am in?? How did you get out?? I've had enough with him already..I want a life I don't have that with him...There is no relationship things only seem to get worse instead of better! I've closed off from him so much that is how he is with me so i've done it back and now there is nothing! He also has other kids 3 girls one he doesn't even talk to and 2 other girls and sees like once a month at this point..i've even stopped putting myself in that circle I don't say much when it comes to them anymore...I feel bad cause there kids but, I just can't do it!

Any help?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2007
Mon, 08-27-2007 - 1:02am

Hmmm, not personally, but from my mom's divorce + money problems.

I hope you're working right now. But anyways, take some time to make a record of all his assets, lest he scam you when you leave. Go see a lawyer about child support rights. Ideally (in canada), you can get your child support deducted straight from his paycheck if he tries to skimp. But the sticky details, I'd discuss with your lawyer. Or if you're short on money, there's usually a legal aid program or some lawyers will work pro-bono or for a percentage of the settlement. Investigate these avenues.

And this man is nothing more than a sperm donor from your post. This is a TWO YEAR OLD that has done nothing wrong. S/he deserves to be treated to a normal loving childhood away from negative influences. Leave as soon as possible.

Susanna

- There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who won't anymore, and who always will. So don't worry about people from your
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Mon, 08-27-2007 - 1:48pm

Welcome to the board southsidegal,


Are you working? Do you quailfy for aid?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2007
Mon, 08-27-2007 - 2:20pm
Thanks for your welcome!
Well heres the thing...I've been at my moms for almost 6 weeks because I broke my ankle and the cast comes off tomorrow..but, then i'll need therapy..I'm a supervisor at Target and cause i'm on my feet all day I have to be on leave which I do get paid for but, at 70% then after 60 days it goes to 60% let me tell ya it really hurts! But, I wouldn't be able to come and stay with my mom as far as move out for good with 2 small kids there is just no way! I did start getting food stamps but, what is housing asst? I really feel like I have no one to talk to anymore...I emailed my sister today with a whole long story oh what happened this morning with him..(he came to my moms with the kids cause they are sick and we of course had a fight) I even said to here I have nobody to talk to she emails me about 1.5 hours later one sentence and says I don't want you to think i'm ignoring you but, I don't know what to say of the whole situation...I started to cry and felt so alone, mad, sad etc. Sorry I guess i'm going alittle off the subject...
I just don't know how people afford to live by themselves with kids!
Have you ever felt like you had nowhere to go or nobody to talk to? Which is why i've come to this site!