Light at the end of a dark tunnel..

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005
Light at the end of a dark tunnel..
3
Tue, 10-04-2005 - 10:45am

Hi Everyone..I am entering week 3 since the split on the phone with my LD man of 3+ years. FINALLY there is light at the end of the tunnel.

I had an honest assessment and realized him meeting another woman for sex was a gift. A gift for him in way of physical pleasure (phooey if I care) and a gift for me as NOW I never will allow him back into my physical life again. Also when I see him this weekend (he comes home for vacation) I feel stronger vs when we initially split.

Reading here, other exerpts on ivillage, The Four Agreements and Mastery of Love (two MUST reads) and prayers to my higher power have helped me see a glimmer of hope. I so deserve SO much more and if he ain't into me and wants another, I let him go. I want someone that wants ONLY ME. I understand his needs and wish him the best. I am thankful we split before he did the deed. That was honorable. Most of all, deep down I wanted to end it too..it was not going anywhere. This is for the best.

Will keep reading and lurking and sharing.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2005
Tue, 10-04-2005 - 12:52pm
Please don't tell me that what I am feeling right now will last that long. My heart is broken and my body is shutting down. How do I cope???
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005
Tue, 10-04-2005 - 1:32pm

Who knows..My ex and I split 3 weeks ago on the phone. Two nights I was on the floor begging God to take away the pain and help me..and ya know what..he did..I am ok..I mean I am sad but I do not miss him (my ex) and since he already has another woman, I want nothing to do with him. He he doesn't want me FULLY why the heck should I cry anymore..I am older and wiser..still weak and still have old demons but for me, I refuse to spend months on this.

A little history: my last ex cheated on me for years..cyber and real. I split with him but hung on being his bed mate for another year while he dated MANY..including who would eventually be his wife. He even cheated on HER with me. I didn't know they were married..long story short, NO MORE. That year killed me. He and I can talk but it took 3 years to heal from the pain I inflicted being attached to him ...

Take all the time you need. Find one source of comfort aside from here..a friend, family or therapist..Move on as best as you can.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2005
Tue, 10-04-2005 - 2:54pm
Thanks! I am trying to heal. I just bought a few breakup books at lunch and can read them and weep later. Take care !!!