Miserable with, miserable without

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2007
Miserable with, miserable without
2
Sun, 08-12-2007 - 3:35am
I just broke up with my boyfriend of eight months about 3 weeks ago. This is actually the second time we have been broken up. At first, I was fine with it. Then I started thinking about it a lot and I realized that I still love him and I missed him terribly. I called him up and we started talking. I saw him today for the first time in 6 weeks. My heart really wants him back but my brain is telling me no. I don't know what to do because I know if I get back with him I will feel suffocated but when I am not with him I feel lonely and sad. He has a ton of great qualities, but a lot of bad as well. I don't know if I should give him a third chance or not. Please help!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2007
Sun, 08-12-2007 - 10:18am

You broke up twice for a reason. I think you get used to that person being there even though the relationship isn't what you want. That's how I see my breakup anyway. It's been really hard but I keep telling myself its for the best and there's something better out there for me and I deserve it. You need to tell yourself that, too.

Just because you love him, that's not enough reason to be together if its not working.

Did you read the book It's Called a Breakup Because Its Broken? I suggest you read it if you haven't.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Sun, 08-12-2007 - 11:55am

Welcome to the board midnightdrive5,


Everything you feel is normal. Don't confuse grief for love. You will have a healing period, of grieving for the end of the relationship - for what might have been, for what could have been, for what you hoped would have been.