More Than Words
Find a Conversation
| Mon, 06-20-2005 - 3:57pm |
yesterday my boyfriend broke up with me. we were only together for 9 months, but the first day i met him i loved him. he told me after a few dates that we would be together always. i could see it in his eyes. he loved me so much that it hurt. we have been living in the same town and spending all our time together. i see his family constantly and they have become a second family to me. he is my best friend in the whole world.
now its all gone. my "family" is gone, my true love is gone. he says that he still loves me and that i am his best friend and that that cant go away. that he just isnt in love with me anymore and that he doesnt know what happened, it just wont work now. i know he hasnt met anyone else. frankly, he would never have had time. i know that he can still love me. i would give anything to fix this or make this better.
what am i supposed to do?
be best friends?
give up and walk away?
be friends but not spend much time together?
move?
how can i get him to love me again? what have i done? how did it happen? my heart is broken and empty and i dont know what to do.
someone please help me.

Pages
I know that my best friend and I broke up, but we are still friends. I am very close to his family and frankly..for a happy ending we are trying to just take things slow and work it all out. We had problems in the past (and still do) that we are just trying to work on slowly...
There really weren't any warning signs, I don't think. We never argue. We have disagreements occasionally, but they never last over an hour. He told me that he had been tired lately, but I thought he really had been tired. we are both new lawyers, so it made sense that he was tired. he said he had been thinking and thinking and he just doesn't think that it could work out. i asked him if we could talk about it and try to work on our problems and all he would say is that he just didnt think that it would work out. i asked him what happened and he said that he has no idea when or what. just that now, he doesnt feel that way anymore.
i desperately want to still be his friends, but i read a few dumb articles on the internet that seemed to think that the only way he would really miss me and really know what he was missing enough to want me back would be for me to completely separate myself from him. but what if it doesnt make him miss me and want me back and then i have completely lost him.
Just be sure to communicate this to him and I am sure if he really wants to remain friends he will be understanding. Eventually he may realize what he lost and want you back. If he doesn't, at least you have given yourself time to heal.
I know it's hard to be strong but surround yourself with friends and when you get the temptation to call, call them or write to us instead : ) I wish you luck and stay stong!
it is nice to know that someone else out there is going through the same thing
i told him i would change to. but sadly i would. i would do anything. i dont even know what happened or what went wrong. i just want one more try. but im sure that that sounds stupid.
are you and your ex still being friends?
i almost spent $25 on an e-book today that promised it would tell me how to get him back. im still considering it. i am actually pathetic.
I feel your pain. I am going through the same thing. I broke it up though b/c I wanted a commitment and he didn't. He wanted to be friends afterwards, I didn't. We tried the friend thing, but things kept getting physical...and actually it was incredibly painful being around him, knowing that he wanted everything except everything, if that makes sense. I don't understand how that other woman posting can be friends with her ex...it was just too much for me to handle. So now I am trying to distance myself from him, but still deep down hoping that he'll want me to be with me 100%, the way I want him. That since I'm not around him all the time, he'll see what he's missing, and do the whole Jerry McGwire thing, haha.
-K.
P.S. I saw that book too about getting him back
Please don't waste your money on a scam!!!
There is no way to "get back" someone who isn't in love you with you anymore. I'm sorry but it's just not going to happen, at least not by anything YOU do.
The best thing for you is to not have any contact with him. You can't be "friends" with someone you are still in love with and trying to do so is one of the most painful feelings in the world.
You need to find a way to accept that you simply are not right for each other. It doesn't mean you're not a good person or that you did anything wrong...you're just not right for each other.
Sheri
Pages