moving on
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moving on
| Wed, 11-03-2004 - 1:44pm |
My situation is really messed up. I need some support. 5 months ago I ran into my high school sweetheart whom I thought of all the time. We began talking and he reaveled he still loved me and i said that I still loved him. Problem was I was married(only for 8 mos.) I wasnt really happy in that relationship either. And he had a serious girlfriend who was 4 mos. pregnant. We continued to talk and eventually he left her and I left my husband. We spend the next 5 mos. together and we were truly happy I finally felt like I had a soulmate. My love for him is like no other and he said he felt the same. We ended up moving in together and I got pregnant. I am now 3 months pregnant. 3 weeks ago his ex gave birth to their son. At first he was totally normmal to me then he started to change. He began being very rude to me and withdrawn. She wont let him take his son on his own so everynight after work hes with her until like 11pm. He has no time for me whatsoever. Heconfessed hes confused. He doesnt know if he still has feelings for her or not and says his feelings are blocked now because of his son. All we have been doing is fighting and he prety much doesnt care about me or this baby I feel. One minute he wants to work things out the next he doesnt. The thing is I know I should tell him to leave because hes not who I need now to support ths pregnancy, its just everytime I do I end up breaking down and begging him to come back. Honestly I dont think he wants to or even cares. I need to be be strong but I just cant imagine my life without him and going throught this pregnancy by myself. I need words of encouragement and support if anyone can help. Thanks

both of you confused feelings with facts, thought they were goals and calls to action - and took action on them in life-altering ways.
You're now pregnant...now if he left a pregnant woman to be with you - why wouldn't he leave you as a pregnant woman to be with someone else?
HE didn't leave her FOR YOU because you were so great, or because she was so terrible - he left because it wasn't the easiest, most convenient and beneficial per his immediate needs situation to be in...which is why he's left you now, as well.
What you can anticipate is to the degree that he remains involved and participatory and financially accountable for the existing child he just had...he'll do that with you if his time/energy/finances permit.
Get a court order for support/visitation and consider yourself a single parent.
Erin
quickblade14@hotmail.com