My husband having affair...let him go?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2006
My husband having affair...let him go?
10
Thu, 06-01-2006 - 3:29pm

My husband having affair...let him go?



  • forget about him and start a new life
  • forgive and forget...wait for him to come back


You will be able to change your vote.


Avatar for iamdelightful
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 06-01-2006 - 3:55pm
There are several other options other than the ones you have listed. It's not a black and white situation.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2003
Thu, 06-01-2006 - 4:23pm
Well, now, it's more complicated than that. How long have you been married? Can you forgive and forget? Will you both go to counseling to work things through? Do you WANT to save the relationship? There's lots to consider....
Click to join the fun!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2006
Thu, 06-01-2006 - 5:02pm
i've been married for 4 years and have 2 kids with him.i already forgive him but still can't forget about what he have done to me....i do still love him and hope he will come back to me.now we are in separation period....he stiil come and visit me and the kids.we sleep in the same room but no sex,hugging each other but no kiss,he still care about me but no love...will he comeback to me?,i don't know...i want to let him go, but i love him so much...waiting for him to comeback,will he comeback?,i don't know...and not sure...no body knows...only god can tell....what should i do to make myself feel better?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2003
Thu, 06-01-2006 - 6:14pm
Can you get past the hurt and get back to trusting him again? Have you two been to a marriage counselor? Would you both consider going?
Click to join the fun!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2006
Thu, 06-01-2006 - 6:39pm
i dont know and not sure about everything right now..about counseling,i dont think he want to do it...i've told him how i feel,how much i love him,and waiting for him to comeback..but he never give me any answer or any respond...i don't know what to do,i couldn't get to sleep one week already,i even tried to take sleeping pills...not trying to kill my self,and i won't do it for god sake...
Avatar for iamdelightful
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 06-02-2006 - 1:45am

Well, you might want to consider not letting him sleep with you anymore. It sounds like he's being quite cruel. He cheated on you and tells you he doesn't know if he wants you yet he still comes to sleep with you and hugs you. Stand up for yourself! He's taking advantage of you. He's treating you badly and will continue to do so until you stop allowing it.

You can't know if he'll ever come back. But maybe you don't even want him to. Can you trust him after what he did? If he won't go to counseling with you, consider going by yourself. It will help you to talk with someone about what you're going through. You're in a really difficult and painful situation.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2003
Fri, 06-02-2006 - 8:56am
Welcome to the Breaking Up is Hard to Do message board, I'm sorry that you are dealing with such a difficult situation.

Visitor (not verified)
anonymous user
Fri, 06-02-2006 - 10:58am
Your best to move on, I know been there done that and I took him back 4 years ago after he cheated on me and things have steadily gotten worse, especially his attitude towards me, so i ssay get the hell out why you still can, if youlet him away with it once whats to stop him from doing it again???
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2003
Fri, 06-02-2006 - 11:45am

I think counseling is important, even if he won't go with you. It could help you to deal with what's happened. Or, you could try visiting Betrayed Spouses Support

Click to join the fun!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2003
Fri, 06-02-2006 - 11:46am
LOL, I should've read the full thread before I posted... great minds think alike!
Click to join the fun!