My situation
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My situation
| Thu, 03-30-2006 - 1:21pm |
i have been reading through this board and noticed all the helpful and supportive responses so i thought i would post my story and get some advice. I am 26, i have a great career, and i recently broke up with my boyfriend who is 28 because basically, he got out of jail, of course he had a hard time finding a job so he has been doing nothing, and he has no motivation to get a job..so we would fight over this constantly and i would feel like his mother all the time, telling him what to do...anyway, i know i am better off without him but i still keep thinking about him, and we hang out at the same places and i am so deathly afraid of running in to him and seeing him with someone else.....any advice on how to just get over it

dmd63...
Welcome to the board!
Pianoguy has 4 thoughts...based on your post.
1. You can't motivate somebody who has NO DESIRE to be motivated! If your b/f eventually wants to find some type of work...he'll find a way!
2. It's clear that the man needs a mother-figure in his life (ie. someone who will pamper, support and 'baby him' whenever he feels it's needed or necessary?) Does this sound like a solid framework for a longterm MAN/WOMAN relationship between the 2 of you?
3. If you were still dating him and he was convicted of another crime...wouldn't that place you in the position of being an 'accessory' or an 'accomplice?' . But what's the point of getting in the middle of a potential 'hornet's nest'---when the beehive is miles away from you?
4. If you see this man with another woman...HE'S HER HEADACHE.....NOT YOURS!
Pianoguy
If you reread your post I think you answered all of your own questions. This guy was no good for you (I don't even know if he is good for his mother) and you were a strong, confident woman who realized that this guy is not bringing anything in to your life.
Kudos for being strong and ending the relationship. Take your sexy self to the places you both frequent, don't let the fact that some guy who is not good enough for you being at a place that you like stop you from having a good time. The only thing I can suggest is not to go to those places by yourself. Drag your friends with you, if they are good friends they will kick you in the behind if you even look in his direction.