For my Taylor...........................

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2004
For my Taylor...........................
2
Wed, 05-11-2005 - 11:53pm

Dear Taylor,

This is the second time that I can remember, where the urge to hear your voice, or the temptation to send you an e-mail has gotten almost too hard to resist. Last time it happened I wrote a letter to you, like I am now and I posted it up on the one in a million chance that somehow fate might lead you to it, should you ever find my name on your heart again.

It's been over a year now since you had to say goodbye to me. It's been the longest year of my life to be honest. Every day I wake up, you're and on my mind. You're with me when I go to work, and your picture and the first note you ever wrote to me telling me you loved me is still kept on the inside of my helmet with the rest of my gear. I don't think a week has gone by since the breakup, where I haven't had a tear in my eye from a memory that popped up, or from hearing a song that reminded me of you.

Tonight a friend let me borrow the movie Ladder 49. I knew that it would be a sad one because of what I was told. The strange part of it is, the parts that make my eye's well up aren't when the guys are in danger, or lost. It's more when I see the man and his lover, from the time they met to the time they married. All of those things brought you back, along with all of the things we shared, all the laughs and all of the quiet moments that made me feel alive. It was those times when I knew who I was, what I stood for and what life was really about.

I still miss so many things you brought to me so effortlessly to make me love you so much. I miss your little notes, wether they be waiting for me when I returned from work in the morning or on the door before I left. I miss the comfort of your breathing when I would wake beside you and the occasional glance I'd get when the moon would shine just right through the window. The softness of your skin and how it would glow in the moonlight. I miss your kiss, the one you never left without giving me before leaving me to go to work in the mornings. I can't pick up Sadie at all when I come home from work and not think of you and how excited you were when I gave her to you.

I guess I could keep going on about all of these things and how much I'd give in my life just to have your presence back in it. I think instead I'll just end it now and let you know that no matter where you are, or where you go in your life, I love you more than anything I ever thought I could. I don't pray every night I lay down, but on the nights I do, I always ask God to make sure you're happy and more so, that you're treated and adored in the way I did and tried.

I hope that there are nights when you remember me. I hope some of the things I did, or the way I made you feel might come back to the surface and at least bring a smile to your face. It's the hardest thing in the world to think I'm a forgotten memory to someone who made my world something I never dreamt it could be.

With all of my heart,

David

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2005
Thu, 05-12-2005 - 10:30am

David,

I just wanted to say that I thought your note was beautiful. I don't know what happened between you and Taylor, but it certainly seems like she was a lucky lady. It's strange how one of us can love the other so much, but we don't get the same in return.

Good luck!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2004
Thu, 05-12-2005 - 10:04pm
(((David)))
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