NC exceptions?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2007
NC exceptions?
4
Tue, 07-17-2007 - 11:30am

So we had the talk last night and both agreed we can't do the relationship anymore. He brought over my things but said there was still some dry cleaning he needed to pick up and some mail I was still getting at his place, so we could email each other about that later. I told him no, that mail was nothing important and if he came across anything else he could just ship it to me. I put my foot down that this time there could be no contact. He said he understood.

So today I begin the process of separating our lives: canceling his flight for a trip to see my family, emailing a cancellation for the surprise bday party I was throwing for him in August (I mentioned it last night to see if he still wanted to have it himself and he said no), taking down pictures, deleting things from my phone--I'm sure you're all familiar with the dance. Here's my problem: We are on a Verizon Family Plan together under his name. I called to cancel mine and set up my own only to be told I can't do it. Only he can. I don't want to talk to him or have him hear from me, but how do I handle this? Just email him? I REALLY don't want to because I don't want him to think for a second it's my sneaky way of contacting him AND I don't want to feel the inevitable disappointment when I get his reply of "It's taken care" or some similar impersonal missive, if he even responds at all. I'm 26 yrs old and feel asking my friend to call him is a little immature. What can I do?

PS - I'm much more sad than I thought I'd be. The crying at my desk thing is starting all over again. I could have SWORN yesterday I was ready for this! How can it hurt so bad when I KNOW it's what I want?

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 07-17-2007 - 11:52am

I would just be very matter of fact when you email him about the phone plan and get it overwith ASAP.

What's your plan B if he doesn't do anything to take care of this?

And *of course* you're sad. Even when you want the breakup, there's always sadness--that's completely normal.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2004
Tue, 07-17-2007 - 12:25pm
As far as the phone goes, you could always ship it to him or have a mutual friend drop it off to him. I just recently broke the NC, and he was acting really nice and concerned; then went back to acting cold. Seeing or talking to him will only mess with your head. And even though you know it's for the best, moving on is easier said than done. Best advice is to just take it one day at a time. If you feel the urge to call him, call a friend instead or get out of the house and do something. Good luck to you!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2007
Tue, 07-17-2007 - 4:08pm

So I emailed him to call Verizon and give me permission to end my acct joint to his. Somehow he misunderstood and just cancelled the acct, so now my only options are:

1.) Get a new phone, new # etc etc

2.) Contact him a SECOND time and have to explain what I meant and try to straighten it out with Verizon. They still won't discuss anything with me.

I still really don't want to talk to him, but the new phone thing is both costly AND timely, and a real pain in the butt! What should I do? Am I over-analyzing everything?

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 07-17-2007 - 4:32pm

Just get the new phone and account.

Consider the $$ an investment in your peace of mind and healing.

Sheri