Need Advice - Help!
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Need Advice - Help!
| Sun, 08-22-2004 - 11:42am |
As many of you know, I have been posting regarding my ex-bf who broke up with me almost 4 months ago...this post has nothing to do with him. This has to do with the bf prior to him. I met this person in a very unique way and we had chemistry from the get go. The relationship was short and very passionate and going way to fast. In the end he got scared and ran, which is his m.o. He is a dyed-in-the-wool commitment-phobe. The minute he gets emotionally attached, he runs far and fast. Now this all happened last summer in which I spent most of it in an emotionally-shattered state. You are going to wonder why I have allowed this person to remain in my life. The simple answer is that I have no idea. He seems to float in and out of my life every couple of months, the contact lasts for a day or two and he goes away again. This time he's been in contact for a lot longer and is saying "I dont know why but i have been thinking about you alot" "I'm not happy with my gf and dont know what to do about her". I've been talking to him as a friend but he wants more. He would like us to be "friends with benefits" but doesnt want to hurt me again. He is a walking contradiction. One minute hes's saying we can't be anything more, no commitment, just good,clean sex to well...maybe something could possibly happen. My problem is that I would like to see him again. I would like to see if there is anything still there. I have moved on and am no longer angry and no longer hate him but I am wondering why he still stays in my life. The easy answer is that he is looking for a bootie call but I have not had sex with him since last summer nor have I seen him. Most of our contact is via text messaging and the telephone. Everytime we try to make plans, he gets scared again and has a thousand excuses as to why we cant meet.
So to get to the point, is there a way he and I can be "friends with benefits" and keep it casual and I can keep my feelings, if I still have any, in check and not get destroyed again?
Signatures On
| Sun, 08-22-2004 - 12:29pm |
I try to live by the Golden Rule - Treat Others The Way You Want To Be Treated. This guy has a girlfriend - would you want some girl having a friends with benefits relationship with your boyfriend? Probably not. Also, would you want anything to do with a guy who cheats? If he cheats on others, he would cheat on you, too. It doesn;t sound like a good situation and there is a lot of potential for you to get hurt.
| Sun, 08-22-2004 - 8:37pm |
You are absolutly right. I would only agree to this if he and his girlfriend had broken up. I do not cheat and I do not get involved with those who are in relationships. He knows this and agrees with me. Deep down I know this is a bad situation. One I should run far away from. His track record with me sucks and he has hurt me badly before. I guess I just like the attention. It's nice to know that someone else finds you attractive. I really haven't been feeling very sexy or attractive lately.
