Need help with "Dear John" letter

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2005
Need help with "Dear John" letter
4
Mon, 08-08-2005 - 7:56am

I made up my mind already, I will break it off, cannot stand this pain any more...I will try to send him the letter this Weds...

But tell me how you all wrote it! This is my first relatonship, I have never done it before, it's so stressful for me...Any advice or tip? Any one willing to show me a sample of your own?--LOL! JK!

girlwattitude

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 08-08-2005 - 10:44am

Hi, I must have missed your previous post about this...so I'm wondering, why a letter rather than face to face or at least a phone call?

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2005
Mon, 08-08-2005 - 10:36pm

Sheri,

1. Cannot talk to him face to face, he is hundreds of miles far away from me. I just got back from my vacation visiting him, no more money to fly back there to break up with him.

2. Cannot talk to him on the phone. I have too many things to say. I have to tell him how I feel, how much he hurt me when he cannot stop hanging on his past relationship, etc. And English is NOT my mother tongue, but his. His vocabulary will beat me if we have a verbal conversation.

Please help...do you think it's too bad to send an email? Should I send him a snail mail instead?

girlwattitude

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2005
Tue, 08-09-2005 - 3:15pm

I think its a good idea - that way if you ever regret it - a least you have the reasons in writing and you can read them when you miss him!...

I had a list of the reasons of why I wanted to break up with my exboyfriend - then he broke up with me..I was like...... oh Hell no!.. Anyways...

Do some free writing and then just clean it up - read it as many times you need to in order to get right!..

Good Luck!

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 08-09-2005 - 6:59pm

Ok, I understand why it can't be face to face.

Does he have any idea this is coming, or will it be out of the blue? If he knows that there are problems in your relationship and that you were considering ending it, then an email or letter would be acceptable under the circumstances. However, if he has no idea, then you need to tell him on the phone, IMO, rather than shocking him with an email or letter.

Sheri