Need some advice :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-11-2006
Need some advice :(
1
Mon, 10-16-2006 - 2:40pm

This is my first time here and i have read a lot of messages that has helped me a lil on the way...

Bare with me with is going to be long lol..

When I first met him he was married (14 years) with 2 kids but had a legal separation and lived in the same household as his wife and kids (he said he lived in the basement and the reason why he stood there was because he needed to wake up and be able to kiss kids good night and good morning) at first I didn’t mind cause I really wasn’t looking for anything serious so what did I care. Well as time went by feelings grew and we spent more and more time together and I just couldn’t take him living in the same house as her so I kind of gave him an ultimatum either move out or we cant continue to see each other, we broke up for a couple of days and he came back to me with all his stuff, he had moved out and moved in with me. At the beginning it was great I loved it. Make a long story short he just started treating me like crap we argued and he would disappear to his moms house for a couple of days left me up in the air and that would last about a week but when we argued we would say nasty and harsh things to me and compare me to his ex wife and again disappear like he didn’t even care…He would swear up and down that I was the best thing that ever happened to him and that I am his queen but if that’s true how can you just leave and not turn back like nothing and talk to me in that way right…Not to mention at times he put his ex wifes feelings first than mine and would do anything she said and his excuse was that he was trying to keep [eace for his kids...At first I was the one running after him and begging him to come back but after a while I just stopped and then he was the one crying and begging to come back and me like a fool would take him back cause I adore this man…well almost 2 years later and the disappearing has now increased to a whole month now and then hell come back and itll be great for a month then hes a jerk again (he would say one thing and be true to his word for a week or 2 then do the opposite and just acts like he doesn’t care)…We have tried to be friends in the past but he lost his mind when he found ou t that I went on a date so we came to terms that we couldn’t be friends anymore..this last argument we had he said that im acting like a jerk and I am being an ass and that I was just being me ( I don’t ever tell him he cant do or can do things) he wants to hang with his friends go ahead have fun (forgot to mention we no longer live together he has his own place) so we see each other maybe 1 or 2 a week and every other weekend we spend time together cause he doesn’t have his kids…bottom line (I know you must be bored by now) is we got into an argument (well he started an argument over something so stupid) on 10/5 and I have been trying to make amends and hes acting like a jerk again but hell send me silly lil text messages..Again how can you say you love someone and say there the best thing that ever happened to you but treat them this way…I need to leave him I know this but just donr know how…My fam and friends hate this man for all he has done to me I have become a different person I am always angry and ready to pounce on anyone….DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO HEEELLLPPPPP

P.S. also forgot to mention that at one point his ex wife got my cell number and was calling me and threatening me and I still stood by his side….

If you are confused please ask questions cause I know this isn’t the best explanation im confused myself...

He tried to text me silly lil textes yesterday and we were taxting back and forth and then i brought up something that he did that was still in the back of my head and when i text him about it hes was like "oh boy you do like to argue just let it go let it go"

I kind of got upset and told him "please do not reach out to me please just leave me alone and whatever i have left at your place get rid of it for i got rid of everything that you left at my place (i didnt but i had to act like im strong lol)...He said "NO PROBLEM....Ouch that hurt

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2006
Mon, 10-16-2006 - 10:21pm
Hi, I responded to your email to me.

Myspace Codes