Need some support and opinions please
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Need some support and opinions please
| Thu, 10-21-2004 - 1:16pm |
Ok, here goes. I told my boyfriend last night that I didn't want to be with him anymore. We have been dating for 6 and a half years. I'm just not happy anymore. I have had these feelings for the past 6 months but wanted to wait to make sure that I wasn't just going through some kind of phase. We have been through alot together and I still love him, but I'm not in love with him. Does that make sense? We constantly argue, he has cheated on me three times that I know about, and I just can't do it anymore. I used to tell myself that everything would work out but I just don't think that it will anymore. I can't trust him. I have tried to make myself forget about everything that he has done but I can't. I think that has alot to do with why I am unhappy. I don't hate him or resent him for what he has done, I just can't get over it. I know that he loves me. I think that he feels the same way that I do but just doesn't want to admit it to himself. I have wanted to get engaged since about year 2 of our relationship but if he would have asked me a week ago to marry him I would have said no. I used to want to have children with him but now it scares me to death to even think that I could pregnant by him. The whole time that we have been dating I have NEVER cheated on him. I've never even looked at another guy that way. Lately though I have been thinking about how nice it would be to date some else and that scared me. When I realized what I was thinking I knew that something was wrong. It's not about sex or that I'm bored with him, I just don't have the same feelings for him that I used to. It hurt me alot to tell him that I wanted to end things, but I'm not heart broken. I think that I am more afraid of being alone than anything. I know that I made the right decision but I feel bad that I hurt him. I know that he will be okay. I think that after a few weeks he will be able to admit to himself that he really wasn't happy and that this was for the best. I guess that I just need to hear some comforting words or something. Sorry that I wrote a book. Thanks for listening.

Oh hun, you made the right choice. He hurt you. You can't stay in a relationship where you keep getting hurt. You'll only end up hurting again and again. I'm proud of you that you have the courage to end it. Don't let yourself get hurt like this again. Try to learn from your experience, and take away the good things....leave all the bad things in your past, and move on. Good luck,
Karen
i'm sure you did make the right choice....and i know how incredibly hard that choice must have been. You are stronger than i am, as i can't bring myself to have a converstaion about "us" with my boyfriend. I can talk about everyone and everything else under the sun, but now about us. Its a mental block. I commend you on your decision. He was cheating on you and probably won't stop, although i am an optimist and would like to think that people DO change.
How are you feeling now? Are you relieved, sad, confused, etc? I think i am going through similar feelings but do not know how to deal. How did he react?
Your post touched me. I broke up with my boyfriend of six years about a month and a half ago. I know it can be hard at times, but it sounds like you're a strong and amazing woman. I'll tell you the first two weeks were kinda hard but the last three or four weeks have been *amazing*. It's been like waking up. I laugh and smile. I feel free. I wish you all these things in the coming weeks. You made the right choice. Good luck to you!
P.S.
If anyone has yahoo instant messenger my sn is i3ai3ygirl20004
Edited 10/26/2004 2:03 pm ET ET by i3ai3ygirl20004