O2 broken hearts, if you can believe it
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O2 broken hearts, if you can believe it
| Mon, 11-21-2005 - 4:40pm |
I posted something similar to this on a different message board and got negative feedback and no-one agreed with me. I recently filed for divorce.....this is the story, when I met my husband 13 years ago I had 2 small children and i told him on our first date it was me and my kids- one package deal. he agreed and even cared/loved my kids. we went on to having 3 more kids and all was well till recently. My older kids hit puberty and having some problems, eventually he kicked them out of the house. I went with them (we've been gone several weeks now) and I cant love someone who doesnt love my kids, simple as that. we are going back and forth with the divorce thing - wait awhile and then proceed then wait awhile and proceed in the hopes of resolving our problems (but never really resolving anything) In the meantime I met someone else who I love spending time with and we had lots of fun, but he recently told me he wasnt interested in a relationship. It hurt and now I feel like I have 2 broken hearts. what do you all think about this wierd situation?

Carrie
Carrie
Hi minodee, welcome to the board.
I guess my first reaction to your post is what could be going on with your kids that is so bad that you and your husband can't work them out as a team? I know teenagers can get into all kinds of trouble, but I don't think kicking them out is a solution unless you have tried everything else.
I realize that you and your two kids are a package deal, but what about your three other children? It doesn't seem fair that because their brother/sister is acting up that they should grow up without a mother in the house. I guess I'm just not sure what the real problem is here... is the problem that you have two teenage kids that have been acting out, or is it that you no longer feel as though you love your husband (or maybe you never did)? If the problem is with your kids, then why are you abandoning your relationship and your other kids? If the problem is your relationship, have you considered couples counseling to work on that?
Obviously I don't know the details of your situation, but I get the feeling a divorce is premature. From your post I get the feeling that both you and your husband are stalling because you don't really want to let go. Maybe you should try family counseling to see if you can save your relationship and your family?
As for the other guy, I think iwinflame is right, you can't just jump into another relationship expecting that to take away your pain. The only way the pain is going to go away is if you really grieve the loss and take the time to heal properly. Unfortunately, there just is no quick way to eliminate the heartache that comes with a breakup, no matter how big or small it is.
Anyway, that's just my two cents, keep us posted.
-Nikki
co-cl of Breaking Up is Hard to Do!