Obsessed with ex

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2004
Obsessed with ex
2
Sat, 08-14-2004 - 12:53am
I need help. I am obsessed with my ex-boyfriend. We broke up months ago but I cannot get over him. He wasn't even that great to me. I think he is seeing someone new and I am obsessed with it. I drive by his house late at night or early in the morning to see if he slept there or call his cell phone (blocking my caller ID). I know that he turns his phone off if he is with someone. It is crazy but I can't get past it. What can I do?
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-16-1997
In reply to: cherygrl
Sat, 08-14-2004 - 1:27am
You sound like you have too much time on your hands.

From an emotional standpoint, you really cannot afford to allow him to occupy so much of your mind. You have got to get busy doing the things in life that you enjoy. What do you like to do with your time? I love going to antique malls and looking for unique items to use in decorating my home. I also love to read and am in the process of preparing a manuscript for publication. On rainy days, I love watching old Audrey Hepburn or Doris Day classic movies.

Whatever you like to do with your time, get busy and enjoy life.

And one last thing -- FORGET HIM and move on!

Take care,

Heymum

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2004
In reply to: cherygrl
Sat, 08-14-2004 - 1:52am
I must admit that I have done the caller ID block calling and the drive bys for the same reason as you have. I know a lot of my girl friends have, also. Perhaps, we all have some innocent "stalking" genes in us. I even have the urge to do it every once in awhile now. But everytime that I want to... I just think that I can't. I can't let him ruin my life and occupy all of my time (cell phone minutes and gas) I don't need to worry if he is with someone else because he does not matter anymore. Driving by and calling will not make it better, just make it worse.

So I have things that I know I can do when I am feeling kind of blue or missing him. (like tonight) I post on here, read, scrapbook, call other people, go out and do something really fun, etc.

You should think of a plan for whenever you have the urge to do one of the stalker-like maneuvers (and I say that with affection). One of my friends is in the same boat as I am, so we have a plan to call each other when the urge hits us.

There are so many more things in this world to worry about or spend time on. Obsessing over guys who no longer want us is not one of them!

I feel your pain. Take care of yourself!